Jack Dorsey and Zuck’s new “handlers” aren’t going to change. They figure they OWN the deal they can do whatever they want. Likely it’s illegal but I’m not sure. I feel we have to take it upon ourselves to share email and phone numbers with those from social media that we want to stay in touch with. We can do this!
The veneer on a piece of furniture can appear in many ways. It can be layers of paint, different color of stain, all of it possibly peeling. There can even be gashes and dent to the wood underneath.
The wood underneath is the truth and it’s rarely seen. It’s the heart of the matter and how the piece of furniture looked at its founding; it’s construction done by the carpenter’s hand. I love watching it progress, drinking in the smell of the wood.
When I look at any piece of furniture that has been stained or painted, I always wonder what the grain of the wood looks like underneath and what type of wood it is. Then I wonder who built it, the year it was built and for whom.
All of our social media; Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, on and on, show only the veneer of humans. We are all projecting a public image that we want others to think is true. It’s the image that we are comfortable having others see. It is the truth regarding how we express ourselves verbally but it’s partial because we’re not in the room physically present with each other. It serves to protect our deepest emotions and events of our lives from being too visible, too vulnerable as our bodies are visible. Maybe we are aligning with a group that “fixes” all that was wrong with our mother or father instead of aligning with our true selves in group settings.
I actually accept that about others. The reason being…underneath we are all innocent children that have had to learn to cope in certain family dynamics and fundamental societal expectations where most of the time, no one asked us what we wanted or how we felt. They just told us what we should do to fit in and be liked. Knowing and obeying those parameters helped us survive and maybe kept us alive. So we view that compromise as fundamentally good. But it’s not. It is surviving, not thriving. That’s how the veneer starts. Most of the veneer comes from religion, state schools, and our family.
It’s something to keep in mind when you communicate on social media. There is no way you’re getting an authentic picture of a person on any of those sites. We all cling to religions, political parties and value systems that we feel emotionally comfortable with culturally. That doesn’t mean that a person who is opposite of you doesn’t have a good heart or a stable mind. It’s amazing how convinced we can be of how right we are when we surround ourselves with people who agree with us.
It’s not about a group as right or wrong. It’s about caring to know who people really are underneath, listening, and being authentic ourselves. We’re called to love-not to judge…anyone…ever…for any reason.
I paused my Zoosk account tonight. I’m getting so many guys viewing me and interested in meeting me who are not desirable; such as bad hygiene, covering how they look with a hat and sunglasses which is highly suspect, looking overly affectionate with their dogs and almost ready to take their pants off. I even changed my screen name so I wouldn’t sound like a pushover. I can’t believe how many lecherous trolls are on there! What are most of the cute ones doing? And the good ones won’t talk to me no matter how many smiles I put up. Or maybe they’re looking for women who are not pretty but slutty and ugly. I hear guys like that. Yeah, very likely. It’s also likely the cute ones are married or have girlfriends and are slumming online for what I just mentioned. Again, the novelty thing.
I’m not going to convince a guy who is shy or scared or too dumb to talk to women to talk to me. For what? My date, who is not my fella ignored my communication. My intuition tells me he’s an asshole that wanted me to jump and come have sex with him right away because he invited me to. When I said no, that nixed everything. God, that’s desperate and dysfunctional. The gaul of me to say I needed to sleep and work in the morning! And that’s the last I heard from him. My sense is he had a girlfriend back at his other place and was trying to cheat on the side. Again, he was too cute to be single. That’s why he wanted me to come right away; the excitement of it. No predictability.
He admitted he had a previous alcohol problem and doesn’t feel he deserves his lovely daughter so my intuition tells me there is a control problem there. If a woman doesn’t come when he shouts, like a dictator, he cuts her head off? Yeah, no. He’s off my list in a big way. I deleted him from my connections.
And just like that, men turn on you. It’s sex or nothing WHEN they want it. Who died and made them god? Women, just…do NOT have any romantic fantasies about men. They are very limited, feel guilty, addicted, and the list goes on. There are a lot of stray dogs out there. Don’t carry around any raw meat.
Can you remember the days before Facebook and Twitter? I can.
When Facebook first came out I thought, “Wow, they want us to bear our private lives on this public platform. Why? I wonder if it’s healthy? And who would pay attention? This is weird. Well, ok!”
It was a psychological ploy to pull information out of us, sell us more shit, and give up our private information to improve marketing. We know that now. It’s amazing to look back on that event as a transition. The overriding thought I had was not very many people would have the courage, to be honest, and write what they really thought and that was correct. Instead, Facebook is spin and posturing. Twitter became more honest and snarky. I personally prefer Twitter most of the time as an adult, but Facebook is far warmer and more personal. It depends on what mood I’m in as to which one I prefer.
What I know now is that I feel like pulling inward and staying local given how unstable everyone has gotten. I don’t think social media is helping there.