Essay; Men Have Feelings During Sex


stock-footage-alone-man-standing-on-the-seashore

WHAT?  Seriously?

I read this article two days ago because I’m trying to figure something out.

Sex Reveals His True Feelings

My jaw was dropping open as I read it.  I’m not sure I believe it but it is from “The Huffington Post” and the fellow sounded sincere.  Then I discussed it with some women. They concur they do believe men have actual “feelings” about their woman’s body that can be poetic, dramatic, and deep. The women don’t understand it or necessarily believe it either, but they do believe men have feelings too. But during sex? Because of our bodies?

My mind is blown. No man I’ve ever been with has expressed himself in a poetic way to me about my body. I’m not saying they haven’t conjectured it or that I’m not hot enough to have been with hot guys. I have! But they have not expressed themselves to me about how they feel about these things. Why? I’ve gotten compliments about certain parts and of course the lusty chasing after me and wanting intimacy which a woman assumes means, the man is into her.

We call some of this lustiness from men objectification of women. It’s not really fair, is it?  If we’re straight, we love a man to love us. We need a man to take care of business. But why is feeling emotional and lusting after a woman’s body objectification when it’s nature? The men probably call it art…or love, or passion. If they do not feel passionate about a woman’s body, then what? Maybe they are gay or just not that into her, or have a different kind of brain that changes their libido…like high functioning autistic men.

It’s called objectification if the guy doesn’t care what you think or how you feel. I care more about how a man thinks and feels (and acts) than how he looks or his money. In fact, his mind is what absolutely turns me on, far more than his body. I don’t know how many women are like me. His tone of voice and the timbre of his voice is the other turn on. I do believe most women are like that regarding a man’s voice. I think our brains are helping us pick the right man to be the father of our children when we’re young. After fifty that all changes. But continuing on about men’s feelings.

The author writes, “When a man is having sex, there’s a rush of emotions. When he sees a beautiful woman underneath him or a beautiful woman on top of him, he gets lost in his sensations.”

WHAT?

I didn’t get the memo.  I really didn’t.

He goes on to say, “Most of the time, the minute he’s released he realizes what he’s said. Then he thinks, “Oh my god, what did I say? I can’t believe I said all those things. I don’t really feel those things. I can’t believe I told her how much I love her, and how much I want to be with her!”

WHAT?  Now, your fellow didn’t actually say this, but his “way” and his thoughts did, is what this author is saying. Well, how about that. I am certainly in a dark forest here guys. I wonder how many other women are?

The author finally says, “Our real feelings come out after the sex. I want you to remember that. I’d like you to pass along this blog to every single woman you know out there. Call it ‘dating insurance’. Make sure he has feelings for you after sex — before you commit your heart

WHAT?

I mean…where does it end?  Is this guy high or is this true to the men out there? The mystery of it all.

 

Body Truth; Bruce Lipton’s book “The Biology of Belief”


The Biology of Belief

I read Bruce’s 1st edition of this book several years ago when it came out and now finished his latest one with changes just now.  I recommend this new 10th Anniversary Edition.

I was reading it because I’m writing my own book that is a memoir encompassing the first half of my life, with the theme of synchronicity cues I saw throughout my life that helped me navigate family and relationship scenarios.  His recent research on epigenetics and the subconscious mind really opened up another panorama for me as I was raised in a genealogically myopic family.  Ancestry was a very big deal.  It was all well-intended, not to be elitist or biased in any way, as my family heartily embraces other cultures.  But it was still overkill.

In my family, I think the purpose was to sweep some skeletons back into their graves; to portray a picture of our family as better than it was in terms of behavior.  This is nothing new.  Welcome to the human family on this planet!  Everyone wants others to believe they’re better than the other guy, that their family is somehow exceptional.  God, it’s nauseating.

So, here’s the new deal though.  Bruce has scientific study upon a scientific study showing that we are in the 2:98 ratio.  Meaning, 2% of our DNA is from our family and 98% of our DNA is from our environment.  What we hear, learn, see, speak, do, pick up like a sponge and imprint on and continue to morph ourselves on is mostly what makes us who we are.  Your DNA keeps changing after birth and throughout your life.  DNA is not static; it’s active!  Your birth genes are practically squat.  All they did was give you a blueprint for your body, but they don’t control your body.  That’s the first breakthrough.  YOWSA!!  Right?

The 2nd big piece of news is that again, tons of studies have shown that your subconscious mind, as a baby, and even pre-conception, conception, prenatal, and early post-natal are completely formed by your mother and father.  Holy crap Batman, we are SCREWED!  Right? No.  You still have a conscious mind and free will, if you use it and activate it.  What your mother thought, felt, watched, said, experienced, ate, the people she hung around, imprinted your subconscious mind that you have no control over and cannot change.  I thought I was going to fall off of my chair when I read that.  The best thing you can do with this is create a good power-sharing relationship between your conscious self (your will) and your subconscious mind (your programming).

Now, before we all panic, do you really know your facts here?  What year were you born? Now go back 12 months (or so) and FIND OUT, if you don’t already know, what your mother was doing, thinking, feeling, and experienced a few months before you were conceived, and then when you were in utero.  That is if you can. This is big information for you because the way it works is, when you as a personality are not consciously picking your life today, willing the way you want things to go, making decisions, etc., you mind relaxes into vigilant subconscious mode, which  you are not in the least aware of, controlled by…your parents.  Holy crap!!  This is frightening to me. When you wonder why you do something that you did not choose…look at your parents.  You imprinted on it like a sponge in utero!  It’s not your fault and you can’t change it.

I was born in 1963.  My mother’s conscious mind, while I was in utero was in the 1950’s world.  That is accurate.  My house today tends to be retro, I’m traditional, love baking, homemaking, cooking, gardening, eating, Leave it To Beaver nauseating stuff feels natural to me.  I can’t help it!  My conscious, birth personality is the opposite, thank god.  I’m a free spirit gypsy, end of the line hippie, artist, dreamer, holistic, musician.  Ah…that’s better.  June Cleaver with hippie flowers and peace sign tattooed on her back is more like it.  I will be going toward that light from now on.

So, if you want to understand yourself better, take your birth year and go backwards into your mother’s time, her way of thinking, and what mindset she was in when you were in her and you will find some BIG answers.  Secondary to her is your father and then all the others in the home and others around them.