I took an Excedrin for the morning’s headache, got back in bed and did some Wim Hof Migraine Breathing. Three cheers for our pal, Mr. Hof!!! The pain vanished, and the caffeine took me back to the words of my dear mother, God rest her soul. “We live in a sex cult.” Yeah, right out […]The sex sense – an alien perspective on love and reductionism
It’s so much easier to melt into your warm flesh because I know how you smell and your voice.
It’s just the nurturing comfort I need right now but you won’t kiss me as you did before.
Something is distinctly unfamiliar…
You feel different in my bed, humidity on a dry. cold, windy day when the sun is loitering in the sky rather than actually warming things up.
You’re a woke soul, a man not a boy with your dreams doing cartwheels.
It’s not love, it’s familiarity which so many humans mistakenly wrap their arms around in tribal joy.
No doubt, what is familiar today will change tomorrow and that intrepid fact is forever familiar all around us.
I loved that, as soon as I walked in the time-honored door, profusely late, you were concerned that I’d gotten lost, in trouble, or something else.
Mmmmm. That’s the good stuff. I’m going there and staying in that sterling feeling. It’s a crack memory in my brain. No one can take it away. I keep a pile of those in a festive drawer for a rainy day.
The shell of a turtle, a carapace, guards your continuance of electric water, straight to your brain, pulls your vibration down in by degrees.
Your skin like a husk full of ridges on corn smells sweet,
hard to pull off at the bottom, tassles so soft on my face, the smell of earth.
Your arm was warm and pleasant as the first tomato of summer in my hungry hand.
Let me bite into that luscious fruit, so sweet and tangy
or a mango stream of juice down my chin.
I’m distracted, clement smells from your back
Why are so sweet yet so smart and severe?
No end to touch makes my breathing peaceful.
I feel happy…oh god I’m doomed.
Indeed, it only lasted one day and you ripped your skin from me again.
At least you can’t take the memory from me.
Words can never erase actions like skin can never cover feelings.
There are two paths leading up to the summit on the mountain.
The mountain is the universe of Mind, Heart, and Knowledge.
The scales of justice, held by blindfolded Athena have innocuously, with no offense, decided that fiction is just a fact told yesterday or… planning to be told in the future.
The only fact is right now, no, right now, no wait. Ok…NOW!
It’s an eternal chase with each in-breath and out-breath, but the final breath happens where both paths meet at the top.
Breathing ends with the fact of death and time claims fiction.
I’m behind a screen.
It’s a beautiful, sapphire screen for some reason with geometric shapes all over it gleaming like a wet, rolling, tumultuous ocean.
The wind is so brisk it’s almost cold and my hair won’t stay off my face.
Why am I still alone standing on this beach?
Why do you want me to stay behind this screen?
I’ve never heard of a friend being afraid to meet a friend. Or is there a fertile seed germinating in you that I’m watering? I’m just guessing, not assuming.
You didn’t know it was there.
Keep the seed in the dark behind that screen so it won’t sprout.
All I can hear is the roar of the gleaming, wet, ocean.
I roll around in my warm bed by myself like a dulcet silken bag of potential poetry spoken into an imaginary lovers ear. Or I could sing to him. I haven’t had that opportunity yet.
I’m happy…really. It’s abundant, nurturing, warm, and close to the earth.
I find the peacefulness of being by myself in a relationship with myself to be magical. I can surf the waves of words that sit below my navel and bring them up into my stomach to digest with my breakfast, then into my heart where my son, cute animals and gentle firemen reside and express it through the voice in my fingers.
Put me on a secure raft in some warm tropical waters and that’s where I am.
Sure, I have to cook, chew my food, do the dishes and take out the trash, but that is atmospheric seasoning to where my percipience is really focused.
My perception is in my body which is still feeling the dream I had last night like a crab secure in its loose-fitting, restful shell.
Only the inspiration of a local tree could suggest I stand up and walk out the door made from it’s relation. The trees get used and splintered for our delight with the fantasy of solid things. My world is really liquid, empty space full of potential.
Why do we want to be right all the time?
Why do I want to be right most of the time?
Why do I glee over saying, “See, I was right!”
Because we doubt ourselves too much so we are reassuring ourselves by saying it.
Because others who doubt themselves doubt us and say it!
Because others project their experience of being shunned for being or doing something that was wrong, onto us.
Because “if you make a mistake, you are forgiven”, isn’t widely practiced.
So, now I try to catch myself and say, “Lisa, do what you feel, study what you feel, write what you feel and use the best skill you’ve got. That’s all you can do.” I’ve got a lot of skill and I’ve paid the piper so I have no reason to doubt myself. Whether anyone will listen and understand has never proven to be plentiful. So what?
And now, when someone criticizes me harshly when I meant absolutely no harm and never do, I know that they have not forgiven themselves for being wrong or someone else has not forgiven them for being wrong or vice versa.
It closes the heart.
Wow, the feeling of being around someone with a closed heart and lots of conditions, or an open heart and few conditions, is night and day.
“Allowing gravity leads the falling and nature rests. Resisting gravity leads the rising and nature displays. Which could we do without? Neither”.-Me
The gravity of each individual Mind pulls us and keeps us in the body, giving off a specific gift, look, flavor, color, and feel.
Individual cells dance with electromagnetic charge set in motion by our feelings and thoughts.
Complete…we can co-create just as we are right now.
Yet gravity still makes us spiral as One toward The Center, all touching and affecting each other.
It’s a paradox.
We are individuals yet we are One.