Intuition and Love


You-cannot-love-without-intuition.-Graham-GreeneThis one floored me when I saw it. What do you think?

The first question I asked myself was “Why is this true?” The quote is attributed to Graham Greene. There are several to be found online and I’m not sure which one he is but those listed are all artists of some type.

I personally agree that we cannot love without intuition because intuition has its source in the unconscious mind, the Id, sex, chaos, passion, wild emotion, dreams and so forth. When we really love someone it’s a powerful draw, magnetic, a longing. In my case, it’s possible destiny. Sometimes the person shows up in our dreams. This is a psychic event as in psyche and not simply lust. I have experienced this. Have you? I want to know if you have. Tell me about it.

There is no rational reason why you are so drawn to this person. But many times there are synchronicities. I’ve blogged on here about my twin flame which was highly surrounded in synchronicity and still is. We’re still in touch, talked a lot last week, and he is being a little warm but nothing major. And another man is in my psychic space that I haven’t fleshed out yet. We haven’t met but I’d like to meet him. I’m not in love with him though as I am with my Twin Flame. Both of them have been in my dreams and are not just issues of lust so I know they are hooked to my psyche.

The Id, which is below the subconscious ego is also basically the lower body, below the navel. From a man’s perspective, of course, you cannot love without intuition because, for them, they cannot love without sex. That begs the question, “Is sex the seat of a man’s intuition?” Holy crap!!!!  I never thought of that but it makes sense. Let me know if you think that’s the case. Women will be floored if that’s true. I need the men to let me know if sex is intuitive for you. I better stop there. As a woman, sex is not intuitive for me. The seat of my intuition is chakras 6, 5, and 4 (third eye, throat, and heart)

I hope I hear from you.

 

Lisa T.

Essay; Sexual Shaming of Men


 

man-in-doubt

I’ve been thinking about this issue for about a year now but it coalesced last night when I read a quite long, but well-thought-out blog post on this site that made light of how many women absorb shame from men when we have sex with them. Before that, we’re fine, happy with ourselves, like being a woman, and like our bodies. I think women are getting better at accepting our bodies as they are and the media is helping with that. I know I am. There are more women of all different sizes on T.V. and in all media. The SIZE SHAMING, no matter what size, has decreased. More women understand that it’s more important for us to love ourselves than to please a man.

But, reading her blog, I immediately related to the experience of being mystified as to why a man I was with would turn pornographic in his tone, talked about how hot I was, did the sweetie, beautiful “speak” and then wanted to get sexually nasty as opposed to sensuous and intimate. My assumption is it’s the testosterone and most women consider it normal. The last lover I had said, “Why do you have to be so seductive?” “Me? Seductive?” I’m a chipmunk! What was he talking about? I don’t think he was seeing who I was; he was seeing who he wanted and needed to see. He was projecting. Women are individuals not porn stars and it’s objectifying to treat us like we’re part of your MENTAL fantasy, not a person in front of you. But again, I’m not sure men can help it because of the shame they’re socialized with. Their minds are all cluttered up with objectifying materialism which makes them feel better. Their feelings are stimulated by things; women’s bodies, food, cars, houses, boats, and on and on. I’m not sure women understand this.

How much does that happen? Probably all the time. It’s men’s fantasy need of having a car or motorcycle that reminds them of a childhood toy that they loved. Then they imagined they were a superhero on that vehicle and some adult males still do it. They get a life-sized one and keep the fantasy going. It’s objectification that transfers over to sex with a woman. I suppose this underlies the barely clad woman advertising a car that is so nauseating to us.

It’s something to keep in mind that men probably watch a tremendous amount of porn because they can’t express their sexual feelings as much as they need to or the way they want to in our civilization that shames it. Most men are not relational, not romantic and don’t want to be yet many women need that to be turned on! If he acquiesced, he would be too much like a woman and he’s not a woman, he’s a man, which means he’s a part wild animal, part human. Not all men are of course but most of them are. It’s scary for some women like me when they turn wild animal. I guess other women like it.

I think that men project a lot onto women, as though it’s our issue, about how turned on they are by feeling ashamed, nasty, or mean. OR…is shame projected on to them from all sides FOR BEING male as though they are expected to be like that even if they are not? The writer I read didn’t say that in her blog or maybe she doesn’t understand it.  I think men get turned on by feeling repulsed. They’re attracted to women and things that are not nice and that are uncivilized and wild. It’s all that testosterone blasting through their brains that blows everything up. It’s the opposite of most women. I know some women are attracted to pain and ugliness, like a sadistic thing but it’s not terribly common. Still, I’m not judging it. Nevertheless, I am not that way.

It appears to me that everything in our civilization exists as it is to control men’s sexual nature and make things peaceable for women and children. Before, most of the time it was working. NOW, society seems to be tearing itself apart because men’s sexual nature is finally coming to the surface, there is more awareness of abuse of women and children, guns are everywhere which men love (you don’t see women using them in public much), we see incest, pedophilia, and sex trafficking at the highest levels of institutions, all the lies, and control about it are coming forward, the institutions don’t know exactly how to lie about it anymore. Men are victims of the system too otherwise they wouldn’t be victimizing those more vulnerable than them. It’s a trickle-down from the women and men in power who hold the system in place.

Civilization uses guilt, shame, control, incarceration, blaming women, sports, and the media all to LIE about men’s sexual nature. I guess we’re still working on a balance to our civilization as though it’s progressed from being in the wild. Sometimes I think it’s worse because it represses the true feelings and then they explode to the surface.

 

 

If You Don’t Give Him Sex When He Suggests It, You May as Well Not Exist.


cropped-divorced_couple_credit_inesbazdar_via_wwwshutterstockcom_cna_9_3_15.jpgUse your intuition on this one. Keep in mind the men are double-minded on this issue and may not even be aware that they are. Meaning, you’ll hear gender equity pronouncements and exhortations to be direct, honest, and yourself in public and on social media and another thing in private one-on-one. In private, if they are sexually attracted to you, they want or need you to take a back seat, be a hot little girl, never ask for anything emotionally, behave more graciously and not so opinionated and don’t initiate so much. Absolutely do not show that you are as smart or smarter than them.

I think part of the issue is men feel gypped by our society for not getting as much sex as they need the way they need it. Men need more interest and fun far more than bonding. Instead, the predominance is on talking and relationships which is women’s way. That’s called civilization and sex isn’t civilized? I think men truly resent it. On the other hand, women appreciate it because we can then use our energy for other things we care about and aren’t beholden or as likely to get pregnant. Most women truly need to be treated with love and care and not so much as sex objects in marriage and out.

Straight men who let you know that they are in no way interested in a relationship before the sexy talk are telling you that there is no way they will ever consider you a human being or even a friend. They are saying, “If you don’t have sex with me when I suggest it, you need to drop off the face of the earth. This exchange has expired because I have no use for you.” They will also lie to you about loving you as a friend. The only men who love you as a friend are gay. To try to wiggle out of their pronouncement of loving you as a friend they will lie about moving and even claim a family member died as an excuse for not calling you when they said they would. These men are wounded and internally weak.

They endorse lying and will say anything in any way shape or form and act an Academy Award-winning performance to scam money and sex in any way they can. They know how to make women love them and then take them for all they’ve got. Usually, they’ve never been married and have no children.

They are not mature enough to consider a woman a friend and lover with no other agreements, commitments, or contracts which they should if they were smart. It would put them on the high road and prove that they can take care of themselves and know how to love. They not only don’t want a commitment, they feel they have the right to ask for sex and then feel no human connection to you whatsoever. They are died-in-the-wool misogynists. Most likely they are narcissists or borderlines as well with a history of childhood abuse that they refuse to forgive.

I know how to work this type of man for as long as I need to in order to confirm their disorder because I suspect they’re working me. Then I’m done because I have ambitious work to do as well. It’s just an experiment on my end. I’m studying them in this gender-biased simulation we live in, no emotion whatsoever. The problem is, it’s much easier for them to do a hook-up and get what they need but not so for me; in fact the opposite.

Mindset; What does “In Your Face” Mean from a Woman?


Women leading

This article is dated May this year. There are a few articles every year to remind us that this Victorian issue is alive and well. Some women just don’t get it and they keep planting seeds of injustice in our minds and then we carry it with us wherever we go in society. I guess we need to set a strong boundary.

Here is the article.

Double Standards That Hold Women Back

Under the top picture, it says,

Women can rarely just be themselves in positions of power.”

This is the first paragraph.

“I suggested she—a rising female attorney at a law firm—be more assertive to make her ideas and opinions heard in meetings. She told me she’s compelled to filter every word lest she is perceived as overly ambitious—or worse, aggressive. She noted that her male counterparts, by comparison, seemed to feel free to say whatever, whenever, without incurring any negative judgment.

She wasn’t wrong—she really did need to choose her words more carefully than the men.”

That’s because Mom said so. Mom knows best. Yeah, no. It’s holding me back with that voice ringing in my head, “Don’t be in your face.”

This next part is just unbelievable and utter crap.

“Women typically rank higher than men on “agreeableness”—they have a reputation for being more nurturing, empathetic, kind, supporting, and accommodating. If you’re a female executive who others consider agreeable, chances are you will be seen as more likable.

But leadership positions require people to command authority. Aggressiveness will do this for you. But for women, the more aggressive they are seen to be, the less likable they are found—by men and women. It’s a double bind.”

There is still a huge chasm between social permission for a man to be assertive and even aggressive and a woman to be the same. This article from Forbes proves that in the year 2019 it’s still alive and kicking despite all of our hope and denouncements. There is also a generational divide here. My mother born in 1940 still projects her values regarding what she was taught about how to behave as a woman onto me because that’s what she is still doing. She’s trying to justify it through me. So do women from my own generation. She still feels free to direct me on what to do as well.

The double standard between women and men being assertive needs to end. The truth is, more women are far more assertive than men and just as competent! I could write about this forever but do read the article and try not to be in denial in your own workplace.

 

 

Heartset; We Can Get a Room…


puzzle-klimt-eventail-index

Most women suck it up even though they don’t want to right away. What if you haven’t met him yet? What if you’ve just talked long distance for a long time? I have to get a vibe in person with a guy. I freakin’ don’t get why guys don’t care about that! They should. I did in the past but I’m not doing it anymore because I deserve to be turned on the way I get turned on. The pleasure of sex is for women also.

I understand and respect the fact that men are ego invested about offering a hookup to a woman and she turns him down when she’s indicated before that she’s attracted to him. It’s a huge deal to a dude. Especially if you already know each other. On the other hand, if a guy just met you and asks for a hook-up he’s basically treating you like a free prostitute. That’s just disgusting. No.

Not doing a hookup with an egomaniac or your boss can get you fired if they want you! That’s how mad guys get. I’ve experienced it first hand. If they know you and you’ve both been flirting, they expect a “Yes” or I suppose they think you were teasing them. I think men take rejection harder than women do. I try not to be too hard on men that let me know they like me but the boundaries do have to be maintained and I have a history of maintaining them in the workplace and in my own office, to the frustration of quite a few men.

I don’t think most women are teasing. I believe we’re thinking, pondering, and checking, putting it through our intuitive radar because women know energy is exchanged as well as body fluids. That’s how we are with men if the woman has any self-respect. We’re in the laboratory of sexual attraction and IT IS NO EASY MATTER FOR US! We need you guys to accept that about us. I accept that it’s simpler for men and every woman knows that. Then you need to accept that it’s more complicated for us. The man’s value system should not dictate the situation and I challenge every woman to stick up for what she wants and what she’s comfortable with. At least have some of it your way. If he’s too pushy, he can walk.

I think a good compromise is three times alone together in person, at least, after you’ve known each other for months. I know that these days that sounds like a long time but, well, that’s just me. I’m sorry but unless there is emotional intimacy I’m not turned on.

Heartset; Take Good Care of My Heart?


Who should take good care of your heart? The only one taking care of your heart should be you. Only share it with everyone else. Your heart condition is your business! Anything else has a disaster at the end of it or chaos. We all know this! Why do people keep doing it? Because it feels good…for a while! It doesn’t last peeps. Lust feels good. Love lasts forever and that comes from loving yourself and being your own best friend.

Do you remember this song? It’s originally a 1984 Jermaine Jackson, Whitney Houston tune. This a new arrangement. Once again, I like the music but completely disagree with the lyrics. LOL! Nevertheless, these two seem like good friends and are flirting galore. That’s very cool. I’m a musician. Musicians have quite a bit of creative eros between them so usually, things flow.

Heartset; Can She Be a Human Being?


cropped-gold-tears-klimt.jpg

She is either the big, bad, controlling monster because she’s a strong, intelligent woman or little Cinderella princess needing the glass slipper put on her foot? Too many men are passive-aggressive about women I suppose because they don’t understand us. We’re neither of those two ends on a linear spectrum. I wonder if men are capable of interpreting relational ideas past duality?

Relating is more complicated than that. Don’t give me the “Men are simple creatures that just need a dog” crap. If you’re going to inflate your ego to the point if feigning vast intelligence, all the top jobs and Nobel Peace Prizes, all the power in public and most of the money and fire women from their position who won’t hook-up with you, then you need to uplevel your brains to friendship with the woman you’re fucking. Then we can share power in public.

Let’s face it. We live in a vampire whored society where everyone is brainwashed to give over their mind and body to marriage, family, church, employer, and state for some money crumbs and the fat cats keep the rest and wait for us to die. Then the funeral homes and cemetery and the rest of the death industry clean up after that. It affects how women and men relate to one another to be sure because we end up in survival mode not thrive mode. That’s not a garden of intimacy.

I’m not and most women are not a misandrist. I just don’t want to have to train my mate the way I train my child. It’s an insult to men and women. We just want the species to survive on the planet, we’re the ones that make, birth, and love the species, and you guys have had your chance for the last 10,000 years. This madness has to stop.

Heartset; A #Female #Intimacy Myth Revealed


There’s a myth I Rumi Water keep running into whenever I really like a man, we know each other and are friends, I’m attracted to him and want to have sex with him. His assumption is, given all of the desires I’ve listed above, I’ll fall in love with him or I am in love with him and want to put a leash around his neck or start a relationship. No, I don’t and it’s a bit insulting to assume women want or need to be hitched to a man or control him. We don’t. Women who want children are more that way for good reason but not me!

He assumes I will want to control him like a dog trainer. So wrong. So very, very wrong. I have my own life. I only control myself. I’m a cat you see. But if you suggest on a first date, “We can get a room,” Uhhh. No. Sex is not going to be the first date. If that’s what you want then you’ll get a woman that just lets her body and energy be eaten for a price or for free. Good luck with that. It’s chaos and she’s likely emotionally messed up as in “a sex addict.”

I’m starting to think it’s the other way around. If he has told me and continues to express that he likes me also, is attracted to me and also wants to have sex, he might fall in love with me, otherwise, we would meet-up. Why aren’t we meeting each other? He couldn’t hook me for sex with lying and saying he loved me as a friend. He obviously doesn’t. No integrity. He’s a user. I pose too much of a challenge.

At least I assumed it from the beginning. I let him run his game to see what he would do to get another notch on his bedpost. All lies.

Friendship and attraction are the basis of everything lasting. Possession and contracts kill it after you’ve had children. You don’t need it in middle age. Most couples break up after their kids are grown anyway. You get bored with each other as lovers and can just be friends. Sexual usage is jungle level not human level and shows a very low intelligence and low spirituality. No thanks.

The myth is that just because a woman has all of those things going on that I listed above that she’s in love with a guy. Nope. Nada. Huh-uh. Not the case.  Most women I know are very good at controlling their feelings and actually choosing them. We’re kind of expert at it for some reason, especially in middle age when there is no longer the motive of reproduction and the extreme lust that comes with reproductive hormones. Maybe we have a highly developed relationship between our amygdala and frontal cortex after fifty because we’ve learned a thing or two? We want real love and friendship, not just lust games, and personality compatibility, not just sex compatibility. Time to grow up.

I’m done. The karma machine is going to run ragged on this one. Good. I hate it when a man can’t emotionally deal with friendship and sex. It’s totally immature.

 

Prose; Why Can’t I See You?


 

ocean waves

I’m behind a screen.

It’s a beautiful, sapphire screen for some reason with geometric shapes all over it gleaming like a wet, rolling, tumultuous ocean.

The wind is so brisk it’s almost cold and my hair won’t stay off my face.

Why am I still alone standing on this beach?

Why do you want me to stay behind this screen?

I’ve never heard of a friend being afraid to meet a friend. Or is there a fertile seed germinating in you that I’m watering? I’m just guessing, not assuming.

You didn’t know it was there.

Keep the seed in the dark behind that screen so it won’t sprout.

All I can hear is the roar of the gleaming, wet, ocean.

Everyday Intuition; Competition at Home


BOOK FINISHED-Everyday Intuition-COVER JPGI remember feeling viscerally competitive on different levels with my previous mates with whom I lived. A lot of that is caused by sex. It gets you all riled up and thus the testosterone levels go up, especially for women which is not the best hormone to have in big supply. We need to relax. I believe that when you live with someone their energy rubs off on you for good or ill. The same would be true of the people with whom you work. This is not something of which most people are conscious.

When humans get around each other they compete more than anything else. To that end, just this morning, I realized that now that I live alone I am absolutely relaxed and feel no competition whatsoever with anyone. I love it. It really suits me and I’m in no mood to contend, compete, fight, create drama, watch the drama, compare myself to other women, try to match power with a man, or seek a man’s attention who has no real interest or connection to me.

It’s a dream come true to start to feel like I’m safe to inhabit my body and be true to myself in my work and personal life. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. It sure was hard getting to this point. Our world is completely vampiric, I’m here to tell you. Barely anyone is centered inside themselves and most people pull energy from outside of themselves from anything they can get their minds on. Not in my home, not in my office, and not with me.

Peace.