Elemental Woman


Fire and Ice

Woman… fire in chains walking through mans’ ice storm.

There is barely anywhere for us to rest on pliable earth, caressed by dew-kissed grass and flowers and visited by genial insects and creatures.

Man is a covetous, territorial beast, contemplating a meal, food for his belly, something to drink, and metal coins, hardware and paper and food from the earth; animals and fruit. They come from her blistering fires too from which he creates.

He craves the warmth of her fire that never dulls and memory of the Sun before the ice came to steal human souls.

Suspicious of her, he does not understand nor can he control her unless…he loves. Her fire can melt or burn and he only steals some warmth for a short time.

A man who loves is a magnificent animal, one that knows no limits and has unbounded strength. He has the strength of the earth, turned from ice and the sun combined because he is the seed willing to lose its cover in order to allow Life.

He willingly takes her to him, feasts, shares, adores and provides a safe place for her fertile ground to grow the eternal seeds she holds from before the time of The Dragon. She holds them still.

But he cannot stay next to her for long or he will melt.

He tries and survival beckons his traverse, summoned by a great dirge of possible conquest and the illusions of mind and heart that he believes are real because his core does not yet burn with equable insight.

Frozen, halcyon outsight of a gelid wasteland is still his birthright.

The feracious earth was given to her as a prolific garden and she waits yet for his icy heart to warm the arable soil for her so she can grow the fruit of breakable man in virile beauty, not in frozen, acrid death and blood.

He is…breakable because he is mortal! The seed must be broken in the soil to become eternal!

She is still in unyielding chains, unloved, unprotected, terribly alone in her vital fire that cannot be momentarily extinguished.

The Sun gave birth to the earth, to ice, to Time and its incessant movement will not cease.

The erudite Magician has given him the wand with which to channel her calescent magic because her heat increases.

Time must move forward but the dextrous tools of man can only thrive if they are forged with the luminosity of her body, to tend the garden of the Earth.

It may lie fallow and untended unless the fire that man discovered can be born in him by tending to her heat. Then he will remain.

Until then he will die, just as he was born.

Lisa Townsend-written on February 17, 2018

Antarctica

 

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I Had The Most Beautiful Dream Last Night


It was a busy dreaming night so I don’t remember everything but I do remember the end and it felt so real. I can feel the difference between a wishful dream, as though my psyche is working out excess emotion, and one where it feels like it was really happening because it was a realistic scenario and the vibe between us was balanced.

Dreams come from the intuition; the unconscious mind and can be supremely helpful in facing some emotional truth that is not coming through in your waking life. To cope with life on earth, we have layers of psychological defense that keeps us from feeling our eternal essence; our souls.

We are born and raised in a specific family and one-third of our mind is literally programmed by our mother and father from in utero time to about five years old. I hate to tell you this but our minds were putty in their hands. This is a well known scientific fact. That’s why in my book “Healer” I talk about asking your mother what her life was like during that time and get details! So I questioned my mother about June 1962-April 1968 which was the time I was in utero-five years old. (I was born in April 1963)

Look at that time period! It was some of the most violent in our country during the 60’s. I was absorbing all of those hippie vibes and tumult in our society although I was fairly shielded from some of it because of the religion in my family. Now that I think about all the violence with the Vietnam war and the assassinations, the sheilding may not have been such a bad thing. But my mom said she was happy and domestic, they had what they needed and she wanted me very much. That’s all good.

So, do this yourself if you can and you will see the bedrock vibes of your subconscious mind THAT CANNOT BE CHANGED. It may help you understand some things. The subconscious also comes through in dreams. It can only be sent to the background of your mind though, by your choice, during your waking life.

This time period is so deep in me, I have to say it does form my essential worldview and I am appalled at institutions, government, all the societal bullshit that the hippie generation railed against. But I was an infant and very small child picking up these vibes.

Back to my dream. My unconscious mind found my twin flame through synchronicity a year ago. That is an amazing, specific, bizarre story in itself related to the art on the cover of my book. We’ve known each other for a year and have not met but have corresponded a lot. There has been an unusual amount of intense emotion between us, I believe because our souls reverberate with each other so much. I was with him in my dream last night. We were in a house and just laying on his bed talking, as though we’d known each other forever.

Twin flames are mirrors of each other’s souls and he and I have strange, specific, unusual interests and habits in common. He sees all of our opposites but they are superficial. On the surface, we were raised differently, in different parts of the country, male and female. That is subconscious programming. We haven’t managed to send that to the back our minds yet and won’t’ be able to be together until we’re functioning in our conscious minds.

Think about this a second. Most couples are in a relationship with a dynamic that mirrors their family issues, the mate as a projection of their own mother or father, sister or brother. Most relationships today are based on working out issues of the birth family or the subconscious mind. That’s why they don’t last! The relationship isn’t created based on your true essence, PAST your birth family.

In my dream, my head was near his and I finally felt his lips. He has amazing lips. There was no…lust so to speak. It was like putting your lips on a leaf or something in nature that’s very beautiful in its natural state. I’ve…never had an experience with a man that reminded me of nature. And his leg was like firm soil, moist but ready to be turned in the warm spring for planting.

Then I woke up to this dimension.

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Science: A Masculine Disorder?


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“Science is based on the professional creation and certification of knowledge which is tied to powerful interest groups, notably the state, corporations and the scientific profession itself. Patriarchy is based on male control of dominant social structures and the exclusion of women from positions of power through means such as direct discrimination, socialization and the gender division of labor.

Patriarchy within the scientific community is manifested through male control of elite positions and various exclusionary devices. The scientific method incorporates masculine features such as the objectification of nature. Scientific knowledge is masculine in its neglect of women’s experience and its adoption of paradigms built on assumptions of competition and hierarchy.”-Jill Bowling and Brian Martin, Ph.D.

Here is another article from an expert! It’s longer but VERY interesting.

Science: a masculine disorder

I woke up this morning, after being hijacked by “a friend” on a thread yesterday and then territorially denigrated in the patriarchal tradition, pondering the question; “Is the scientific method itself horse-and-buggy, materialist, patriarchal B.S.?  Is that possible? Before today, I pretty much supported it, although its methodology seemed very simplistic to me and not at all holistic. Was I the only one wondering if this might be true?

I wonder this because as a fifty-four-year-old female who is trained in science as far as needed in licensed health care, my intuition is as consistent and rational as anything I see or feel in this material world.  I also listen to it.  This phenomenon is mostly ignored, cynically scoffed at, and at best, not understood by most people including my ex-friend who has patently disrespected my intuitive read of the Mayan Harmonic for months now.  He just now told me how much better he is than me which kind of says it all.

My patients have confirmed my hands-on intuition with their bodies for fifteen years so it’s like breathing to me now.  I put my hands on someone and I can feel everything that’s going on. Then they confirm it verbally after I tell them what I sense.  Then I treat on the manifested body and they feel it again. I don’t feel it physically initially; I sense the energetic cause of the physical manifestation which is the cause of all illness; thoughts and feelings or vibrations then I assess and treat tactilely.

My ex-friend, who fancies himself a scientist, knows nothing to very little about the body and doesn’t even work in the sciences. I’ve made my living in healthcare for seventeen years. There are lessons to be learned by all.  For instance, in the last week I’ve learned two lessons:

  1.  It is unwise to only see the good in people when their shadow is blasting you in the face. They operate from cynicism and usage; not love, and you can feel it.
  2.  Many men do not have intuition on their radar and if they do, they subjugate it for the purposes of patriarchal power (money and control) or addiction. They view intuition as feminized or sub-cultural which would weaken their position in society. Other cultures can follow their intuition but patriarchal men from all cultures do not. They only use and objectify women sexually and poor people economically, no matter how nice they may seem and politically correct with their rhetoric. It’s fake. It takes an experienced and trained eye and ear to see it.  The first tip-off is, they never ask you how you are, and if they do, it’s not genuine.  You can feel it.

“Long-term structural change in science must be predicated on changing the relations between men and women.”

This applies across cultures, all over the world.  The real issue of disparity on the planet is between women and men all over the world and the rest of the issues follow.  Women are still treated in a barbaric manner, especially the child bride phenomenon.

“Complementing this approach is that taken by those specifically focusing on the reasons why there are not more women involved in the sciences. Several writers have examined science education, particularly looking at the reasons why girls leave science in their school years. Following the observations that boys get more teacher attention and girls have less confidence in their ability, in Australia, there have been some experiments with all-girls science and mathematics classes.

There has also been an analysis of the way in which science is constructed to reflect male values and suggestions about how to create a different sort of science. Arditti, for instance, argues for a feminist perspective which “would re-introduce and re-legitimize the intuitive approach”.

To be continued…

 

Woman’s Intuition Gone Awry


The Female Price of Male Pleasure

by Lili Loofbourow

Female price of male pleasure

One of the compliments girls get most as kids is that they’re pretty; they learn, accordingly, that a lot of their social value resides in how much others enjoy looking at them. They’re taught to take pleasure in other people’s pleasure in their looks. Indeed, this is the main way they’re socially rewarded.

This is also how women are taught to be good hosts. To subordinate their desires to those of others. To avoid confrontation. At every turn, women are taught that how someone reacts to them does more to establish their goodness and worth than anything they themselves might feel.”

I hope you clicked on the link above and at least skimmed this article.  I found it to be another one of those disturbing ones. This quote from the article, for instance, is very true.  But I have never chosen to be with the type of man that would be that inconsiderate of my body.  Is the author suggesting that women don’t have a choice in the type of partner she chooses?  That’s ludicrous.

I wish we lived in a world that encouraged women to attend to their bodies’ pain signals instead of powering through like endurance champs. It would be grand if women (and men) were taught to consider a woman’s pain abnormal; better still if we understood a woman’s discomfort to be reason enough to cut a man’s pleasure short.”

I wouldn’t give a man with this type of attitude the time of day.  I might even give him some grief! Men don’t have the right to cause us any type of pain and we don’t have the right to cause them any type of pain either!  This is a human issue.

My nineteen-year-old son swears to me that his generation has quite a different attitude toward sex.  Yet, as his mother, I really have never found him to be terribly respectful of me as a female.  He learned that from his hippie generation father who had mama issues.

But those aren’t actually the lessons society teaches — no, not even to “entitled” millennials. Remember: Sex is always a step behind social progress in other areas because of its intimacy.”

I’m not sure what she means here but it could have to do with the expression of emotions.  That is something that you definitely are raised to do or not do. My son has always expressed his feelings so I can only hope he will listen to his female partners’ feelings as well.  I can’t imagine it to be any other way, but who knows.

This article is well worth the read and I’m still chewing on it.  The short of it is that woman’s intuition needs to come UP when it comes to her body.  The days of patriarchy and misogynist men dictating to us our physical reality are ending.  It needs to end! I have never hesitated to speak up and communicate what I like and what I want to my male partner and have had a pretty good sex life because of that. I notice that as I take care of my body better and can move better, I feel more confident.  All of that is completely within my control and I encourage women to take care of themselves, focus on what they want for their bodies and move forward with that instead of blaming men and society for issues that are fully within their control if they’ll just focus their will and mind.

 

There’s No One Left. I’m Alone.


It has finally happened after twenty years.

I live alone in my house, no men, no noise, no demands for food or rides, this or that, “Mom can you help me!” “C’mon, let’s go to the store”.

My son’s dad died two years ago…the last time I saw him was Christmas Day. Five days later, he was gone. I barely eeked out a smile as I said goodbye. He had been pretty emotionally abusive to me, frustrated his whole life, not knowing he was high-functioning autistic savant until three months beforehand. My efforts at solace could not change his brain, but he was a music legend on the pile of my torn apart heart. In addition, my son did not see him respect me; the fruits of patriarchy.

Three months later my fiance died. I had fifteen minutes notice. We loved each other and did everything for each other. It was not to be. He had not taken care of his body and it caught up with him.

Now four days ago, my nineteen-year-old son went out the door with his backpack and no notice to start his hero’s adventure quest which is his birthright. Good for him but he could have warned me! It reminded me of the sudden death of my fiance.

On his way out of course, he was mad at me and said I was so selfish. I suppose because I take care of myself. I wonder if he thought of his words effect on me, skipping them like stones across the water? Doubtful at his age.

But the men walk out quickly and don’t return I’ve learned, to the other side of this world…or town. It doesn’t matter. They’re not with me.

It is so peaceful in this house without a raucous male. Part of me has waited twenty years to take my body back from my partners and my son, and before that, a line of men, but not a long line.

Now I get an adventure quest; a fresh start, the second half of my life, a thriving business, a home, free to do whatever I want and a body with no risk of pregnancy. I haven’t given it all away.

It’s like this secret I have as a fifty-four-year-old who no one would suspect and assumes in our youth-worshipping culture, female-sacrificing altars around every corner, that I’m all washed up.

“Hasn’t that woman been laid flat yet? Well, why not?”

“She’s selfish!” they cry.

Truth is, I am my own best friend and for the first time in my life, I’m taking care of my body for me and no one else. More and more women are doing it. I’m not alone. We still have work to do and adventure quests to commence. Ridiculous isn’t it.

I feign an attitude and a bird ready to flip until my dying day…because I said so.

A New Crowd, “Molecules of Emotion”


It’s time to finish up Chapter 11 and Dr. Pert’s life has completely changed.  She’s in a “labless existence” as she puts it.  Being in healthcare myself, I can’t imagine being without my office where I treat my patients.  I’d be lost without it!

In 1991, she met Deepak Chopra, MD who is still sort of a rock star in the field of leading-edge holistic medicine, similar to Andrew Weil, MD.  They “get it” on an energy level and use their intuition, not just their allopathic, reductionist training in their work. She is now a regular on the circuit of speakers and is called “the bodymind scientist” and following Stanley Krippner, Ernest Rossi, Stan Grof, Willis Haran, Fritjof Capra, Beverly Rubik, John Upledger, and Joan Borysenko. She says,

The ability to accept very diametrically opposite points of view is due I believe, to the fact that I’m a woman. Because women have a thicker corpus callosum, the bundle of nerves that bridges the left and right brain hemispheres, they are able to switch back and forth from the rational, or left brain, to the intuitive, or right brain with relative ease. With fewer nerves connecting the hemispheres, men tend to more focused in one hemisphere or the other”

Of course, there are men who are open-minded and not “objectifiers”, which I just read yesterday in a prominent article about how to tell if your partner is truly straight or bi-sexual, written by a psychologist.  Here is a link to the article.  I found it very enlightening. Women wonder about this all the time these days. Here is the link.

Is Your Man Gay or Straight

I have to wonder what this doctor would have to say about Dr. Pert’s statement regarding the corpus callosum. He calls women “relational” when it comes to sex and men “objectifiers”.  I have personally found that too for the 54 years of my life.  It’s terribly hard on women. Our emotions tend to be involved with sex and we bond easily.  Women these days are trying NOT to bond but I feel that’s a mistake and is lowering ourselves to the level of many men. How is that helping?

Well, women need sex, I believe more than men do. If we’re going to get the sex we need, maybe some of us have decided that for our health, it’s worth the compromise. I’m guessing men would say that being married and monogamous is terribly hard on them but it sure is expected of them on the surface by all of our institutions! I know it’s a two-way street and it’s no one’s fault! Nature and evolution have made the genders this way, I feel and I wish we’d stop fighting about it and try to compromise; the institutions’ values be damned. It’s about our bodies and our hearts when it comes to men and women.  Those two combined affect our families and I believe we all care about our children and families. If we don’t keep it together, it rips the foundation of our society apart.

Now she finds an investor for Peptide T.  Hurray! He is Eckart Wintzen and the year is late 1990.  She did not pursue him; he came to her.  He was a millionaire and said, “Call me if you need anything.” They were about to go bankrupt and quite gloomy about the prospects for Peptide T research. Synchronistically, she received a call from Mr. Wintzen on the deadline and he said he would send her the money that she hadn’t even asked for! With a simple FAX, the government now got what they needed, proof that she had a major investor, one who could without a doubt supply the millions needed to support further research and development and successfully bring the drug to the marketplace. The solution had come only when she had stopped trying.

Relationship Anarchy & Monogamy


It seems that there is no logical contradiction in romantically loving two people at the same time. But the issue here is psychological, as it generates profound emotional dissonance. (If you invest yourself which women do by nature).

The dissonance stems from the fact that by definition, emotions demand partiality, that is, the preference of one person over another, which entails some sort of exclusivity. Partiality for a certain man or woman is a function of nature for the purpose of beneficial reproduction and it always has been. Pheremones control the process and generally, women do the picking since we are the soil that grows the baby and the seed. The male sperm is fertilizer which may account for the lack of bond and his lack of emotion tied to sex or any physical body. I don’t know. Women’s bodies know everything, are emotional and do bond and nurture. It’s crazy being a woman. We’re like walking magic without even trying.

Emotionally, it is extremely painful to imagine your lover in the arms of another person. Indeed, most of those who told of being romantically in love with two people at the same time and pleased with the experience also claimed that they would not like to be at the other end of the relationship; that is, they would find it enormously difficult, if not impossible, to share their beloved with someone else.

The deeper problem, however, does not concern normative values, as seen in heteronormativity and amatonormativity but rather emotional ones. It can’t really be completely intellectualized. Even if this process of relaxing of moral norms continues, and there is no reason why it shouldn’t, a major problem remains: the partiality that colors our emotional system, and in particular jealousy, fear, humiliation, and sorrow which are associated with realizing that your beloved partner is in love with someone else. These are million-year-old brain functions brought on by hormones for our survival!

How can you not be partial toward someone you bond your soul (body and mind) to? Answer; You don’t bond. If that continues, the foundation of society, the family within a community, unravels.

But if you are a unique individual, then you must only bind your soul to another unique individual to which you are in affinity. Because you are individual, it can only ever be partial because you largely belong to yourself, is my thought. What of that?

Pardon my bluntness here, but I believe that in essence, wives are patriarchal fuck girls that serve as a status trophy for a man. The king in his castle. “This is the fuck girl (wife) that will bear my children says the fuckboy. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want the delight of other pussies that I call friends”. And millions of men feel entitled to just that… while they’re married…secretly. No love, no bond. But the fact that they married shields them from the truth. They “appear” to be bonded in monogamy which is a sign of emotional maturity, as long as they don’t get caught being immature and indulgent.

Post-fertility, I have no idea what my function is to a man. It’s not going to be a nurse to his lack of health. I do know that a woman, absent the fear of getting pregnant and remaining sexual and healthy could turn the world on its head. It could be considered a woman’s prime and make all the young perky girls ruffle in competition. I guess that’s a cougar. It’s tempting.

But what about bonding? When are men going to feel a compulsion and obligation to love and bond as much as women?

I don’t know. I just know that sex is meaningless and jungle level without it. I’m not interested.

Woman’s Intuition


I don’t know if living with a male ages a woman or not living with a male ages a woman.  It depends right?  I’m not suggesting that men don’t have intuition.  My empirical observation is that women are just more experienced with intuition and more accepting of it than men are.  It’s more of a fact of nature to me than anything.  Maybe we’ve evolved the trait over time. Nevertheless, my radar was on last night.

I had a date last night for the first time in a year; with a man.  The synchronicity about it was, the same day, I had been contacted by the fellow I had last dated ten months ago and had been fairly traumatized by actually. That’s a long story and I don’t think that there is ever one person responsible for the trouble in a relationship, but I have more scruples than he does; for sure. His call was trying to create a pretext for seeing me again by pretending he cared about my book when I didn’t even ask him for help (he’s an editor). The short of it is, I called him out on the emotional mess he left of “he and I” and told him “bon voyage” even though he doesn’t really have the guts to move out west by himself as he said he would back in October, which he used as an earlier excuse not to see me anymore. Or maybe, since today is his birthday, he thought I would be schmuck enough to make him a birthday pie as I did last year.  Not a chance in hell buddy.

I’m not sure if my scruples are a problem or not when I have a lover. I feel like it makes me “unbedable” in a way because I value love. I’m not a prude by any stretch of the imagination.  I just like love and bonding, not hookups and this last fellow was the one responsible for taking it too fast. He was like a wild monkey. That would be hot if he also cared about me but because he didn’t, he pissed me off. I’m an intelligent human being with a heart and mind not a chimp in the jungle. Sex alone does nothing for me.  I digress. He’s done for.

Back to my current date…Maybe I’m somewhat old-fashioned, but telling the truth would be good for starters. His profile said that he was 50 years old. Since we were in a Chinese restaurant looking at the placemat with Chinese animals per year of birth, I asked him what year he was born. The answer, “1961”.  The dude was 56. I need to date a younger man, like 45-54 because of my attitude and look.  Two doctors in the last two months said they thought I was forty so I’m not in denial like some women, and I take care of myself and don’t smoke or drink too much. Both of those ages a person.

He kept projecting all of these character defects onto me on our first date.  It was truly repulsive. Harvey Weinstein’s face kept flashing in front of me.  I told him the Kung Pao Shrimp was very salty to my taste but the flavor was good. When I didn’t tell the waiter that but said it was fine because I don’t care if the waiter knows or not, he chided me, “You need to tell the truth!” Really dude?  Who was your last woman?  A criminal?

I don’t eat much salt and Chinese restaurants are notorious for salt so it’s not like the restaurant did anything out of character. I’m not going to bother with it. But the first thing out of his mouth was remembering how proud I was of my work when he offloaded regarding his body to me in a previous phone call. Boy did that piss him off. Apparently, it pissed me off that he decided to go get a spa massage after I spent a half hour listening to and talking to him about his back and how my manual therapy work could help him. He wasted my time. The conversation ended with him saying, “I’ll just go see a massage therapist.” I’d forgotten about it until last night, so apparently, the purpose of the date was for him to throw his resentment and offload to my face.  Then he very proudly asked the waiter to split the bill. It was abusive.

So here we are in 2017, where a kindly, very intelligent very skilled, cute single woman is being herself, namely me, and a guy who has been divorced by the mother of his three children who has obviously failed miserably in some arena is going to take it out on his dates instead of fixing his mess. I posted this before, but there is something emotionally wrong with guys. I think he’s going to die old and alone because of his ego. He can think he’s a catch, and he said as much, but by his behavior, is anything BUT a catch. Talk is cheap guys. Deeds over words. We hardly spent any time together and he was a major jerk.

Mind you, his online profile was sparkling. My intuition told me to stand him up just from the tone of his texts. I didn’t think he would show up. So, I let him show up first, he texted me he wanted me to come, so I went. I should have listened to my intuition.  He was a class A jerk, but cute.  I don’t care about cute when the heart is cold. A cold heart is a misogynist and I suggest you get your heart healed and fix your behavior before you date a woman who is not a hookup. Oh, and he would have rather we met in a bar but didn’t say that beforehand.  Spare me.

Turning Point


stars

Dr. Pert was speaking of Norman Cousins:

What the body needed was the life-affirming, joyous experience of laughter.  State of mind, thought, and feelings, all of which were completely ignored by the medical model, did, in fact, play a major role in recovery.  He even postulated that the laughter had triggered a release of endorphins, which, by elevating his mood, had somehow brought about a total remission of his disease.“-pg. 167 of “Molecules of Emotion”

NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS TO US IN THE BODY, NO MATTER WHO HAS TRIED TO OR HAS VICTIMIZED US, IT IS COMPLETELY WITHIN OUR OWN POWER TO CHANGE, TURNAROUND, AND DO WHAT WE WILL WITH OUR OWN MINDS AND BODIES. We all intuitively know this and try to reason it away.

There is no blame because we have individually been given this full power.  There are no accidents; everything happens for a reason.  And NO ONE ESCAPES the REPERCUSSIONS of the HARM they do to others or themselves. The forces of karma are real. It’s not up to us to get revenge.

Ego says, “I’m sick and useless.  Everyone must drop what they’re doing and give me their energy for myself to use and throw into my black hole of toxic energy because I have NONE within myself.  Everyone else took it from me. I am a poor wretch.”  That’s a huge lie. It’s like a dementor and those in affinity will be drawn to you like a moth to a flame. Those sitting in the light of fullness and self-care will keep you far away if they are wise.

We each have a duty on this planet to transcend, release, forgive, and take action on behalf of ourselves to be well no matter what and FOCUS on what we want to feel for our own bodies and mind.  Stop blaming and take responsibility for your power to think, feel, and create. Stop giving your time and mind to religion, family, politics, and shopping that are negative if you want to be whole.

If you verbally, mentally, and emotionally think of how evil and wrong others are all day and then hate yourself too, you are full of murder, hate, vile disease, and toxic energy that no one who sits in love should be around. You are creating it with your mental focus. Pivot away from that. The Universe has your back.  Sit in the truth of love and wholeness, not in lies.

The universe agreed to allow you to come into the body and CREATE WITH YOUR BODY AND TIME, the experiential learning of your choice.  Now get busy and stop blaming others for the condition of your body and mind, wasting your time, and do something productive that you want to do.

There is no end to forgiveness from the universe or support for you to pivot and change because they don’t have an opinion of you. No one really does and if they do, it has no power because you are the boss of your body and mind, not them. The only opinion that matters to you is your own. The Universe comes from and sits in pure love.  You can use and roll with that or you can resist it.  It’s all your choice.  But wellness and wholeness is the truth, 24/7, available to your mind and heart to use, focus on, and create.  Practice makes perfect.

Do you believe it or not?  It’s the difference between being constructive or destructive with your time.  Are you helping or harming the planet? Do you hate God/Source or do you Love? God hasn’t done anything to you; humans have because they are imperfect, and so are you.  So, let it go and do good to yourself and others no matter what!!!

Maybe Humans Crave Certain Feelings, not Drugs Themselves


That’s a pretty interesting suggestion.  It’s probably not a new one but I sure don’t hear anyone talking about that.  It would mean that you crave the way a drug makes you feel.

You may say, “Well yeah!” Pardon me if my realization sounds naive or conservative.  I’m not.  I’m an extremely liberal woman but I was born sober, so obviously I’m liberal intellectually, in speaking, and in friendships, not in my hobbies.  I have never craved drugs and when I do try them they don’t affect me.  Go figure.  I’ve used alcohol, been buzzed many times and only drunk once. It does nothing for my feelings at all nor does it make my body change much, good or bad. I’ve used pot maybe five times and it doesn’t affect me. I’ve used different kinds of tobacco and I like the smell of it because it reminds me of jazz, but that’s it. I cannot relate to craving a drug to make my feelings change. That’s as odd to me as thinking that changing my clothes will change my personality.  It’s extremely irrational and makes no sense to me.

I AM exceedingly familiar with my feelings changing though, a lot!!  My feelings have always swung this way and that naturally ever since I’ve been a child.  I am in touch with a range of feelings that as a professionally trained actor, I’m able to evoke or bring to the surface quite easily.  So, it must just be my personality; the way my brain works. It does run in my family, being theatrical, but we are also counselors, therapists, and mediums.  I’m also a musician.  I come from an emotionally expressive family so that was seeded in my subconscious in utero.

What all of this is bringing to light is the fact that if you have an expressive art you can imbibe in, maybe those feelings you’re craving will start flowing and your drug craving may go down.  We all need to let our feelings out.  And what about sex?  I know women tend to be more emotional during sex than men if men are at all, but more sex would be good for women then. Most women are as comfortable with sexual feelings as they are with taking a shower or feeling ill.  It’s just part of having a body.  I know this is diametrically opposed to men.

Men, I don’t know how you deal with your feelings other than drinking.  My 19-year-old son tells me that men do get emotionally attached in relationships even though males don’t get emotional during sex itself.  I know that the emotion of sexual tension that occurs when you’re attracted to a female is very uncomfortable for most men and FEAR is your big emotion; maybe even anger at not being able to control the woman’s sexual feelings? That was some inside information I received yesterday that was fascinating.  So, let yourself “be” in a relationship, talking, feeling bonded to other males and females as friends are very therapeutic for guys.  Also, just letting yourself feel the sexual tension with a woman you like.  It doesn’t mean you have to take any major action on it immediately…I guess.

As a female, I don’t really emotionally need friendships as much as I need sex.  I don’t think many women admit that but that’s definitely the case for me.  Or maybe I’m just far more into feeling my body in its natural state than others are. So it’s more important for me to have a partner than many friendships…eventually.

I’ll follow this blog up with my intuition and findings on sexual tension between men and women and maybe even women and women and men and men.  That should be compelling and timely. The issue seems to be unraveling our society on all levels. It’s about time right? This male fear and issue of emotional control is called patriarchy; then it manifests in forced sex. Nada. But are women really completely emotionally innocent in all of this? I really don’t know, seriously asking.

Is it possible that the psychology of sexual predation and sexual harassment is a form of sexual tension that is physically out of alignment because of pent-up feelings? Stay tuned.