There’s No One Left. I’m Alone.


It has finally happened after twenty years.

I live alone in my house, no men, no noise, no demands for food or rides, this or that, “Mom can you help me!” “C’mon, let’s go to the store”.

My son’s dad died two years ago…the last time I saw him was Christmas Day. Five days later, he was gone. I barely eeked out a smile as I said goodbye. He had been pretty emotionally abusive to me, frustrated his whole life, not knowing he was high-functioning autistic savant until three months beforehand. My efforts at solace could not change his brain, but he was a music legend on the pile of my torn apart heart. In addition, my son did not see him respect me; the fruits of patriarchy.

Three months later my fiance died. I had fifteen minutes notice. We loved each other and did everything for each other. It was not to be. He had not taken care of his body and it caught up with him.

Now four days ago, my nineteen-year-old son went out the door with his backpack and no notice to start his hero’s adventure quest which is his birthright. Good for him but he could have warned me! It reminded me of the sudden death of my fiance.

On his way out of course, he was mad at me and said I was so selfish. I suppose because I take care of myself. I wonder if he thought of his words effect on me, skipping them like stones across the water? Doubtful at his age.

But the men walk out quickly and don’t return I’ve learned, to the other side of this world…or town. It doesn’t matter. They’re not with me.

It is so peaceful in this house without a raucous male. Part of me has waited twenty years to take my body back from my partners and my son, and before that, a line of men, but not a long line.

Now I get an adventure quest; a fresh start, the second half of my life, a thriving business, a home, free to do whatever I want and a body with no risk of pregnancy. I haven’t given it all away.

It’s like this secret I have as a fifty-four-year-old who no one would suspect and assumes in our youth-worshipping culture, female-sacrificing altars around every corner, that I’m all washed up.

“Hasn’t that woman been laid flat yet? Well, why not?”

“She’s selfish!” they cry.

Truth is, I am my own best friend and for the first time in my life, I’m taking care of my body for me and no one else. More and more women are doing it. I’m not alone. We still have work to do and adventure quests to commence. Ridiculous isn’t it.

I feign an attitude and a bird ready to flip until my dying day…because I said so.

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A New Crowd, “Molecules of Emotion”


It’s time to finish up Chapter 11 and Dr. Pert’s life has completely changed.  She’s in a “labless existence” as she puts it.  Being in healthcare myself, I can’t imagine being without my office where I treat my patients.  I’d be lost without it!

In 1991, she met Deepak Chopra, MD who is still sort of a rock star in the field of leading-edge holistic medicine, similar to Andrew Weil, MD.  They “get it” on an energy level and use their intuition, not just their allopathic, reductionist training in their work. She is now a regular on the circuit of speakers and is called “the bodymind scientist” and following Stanley Krippner, Ernest Rossi, Stan Grof, Willis Haran, Fritjof Capra, Beverly Rubik, John Upledger, and Joan Borysenko. She says,

The ability to accept very diametrically opposite points of view is due I believe, to the fact that I’m a woman. Because women have a thicker corpus callosum, the bundle of nerves that bridges the left and right brain hemispheres, they are able to switch back and forth from the rational, or left brain, to the intuitive, or right brain with relative ease. With fewer nerves connecting the hemispheres, men tend to more focused in one hemisphere or the other”

Of course, there are men who are open-minded and not “objectifiers”, which I just read yesterday in a prominent article about how to tell if your partner is truly straight or bi-sexual, written by a psychologist.  Here is a link to the article.  I found it very enlightening. Women wonder about this all the time these days. Here is the link.

Is Your Man Gay or Straight

I have to wonder what this doctor would have to say about Dr. Pert’s statement regarding the corpus callosum. He calls women “relational” when it comes to sex and men “objectifiers”.  I have personally found that too for the 54 years of my life.  It’s terribly hard on women. Our emotions tend to be involved with sex and we bond easily.  Women these days are trying NOT to bond but I feel that’s a mistake and is lowering ourselves to the level of many men. How is that helping?

Well, women need sex, I believe more than men do. If we’re going to get the sex we need, maybe some of us have decided that for our health, it’s worth the compromise. I’m guessing men would say that being married and monogamous is terribly hard on them but it sure is expected of them on the surface by all of our institutions! I know it’s a two-way street and it’s no one’s fault! Nature and evolution have made the genders this way, I feel and I wish we’d stop fighting about it and try to compromise; the institutions’ values be damned. It’s about our bodies and our hearts when it comes to men and women.  Those two combined affect our families and I believe we all care about our children and families. If we don’t keep it together, it rips the foundation of our society apart.

Now she finds an investor for Peptide T.  Hurray! He is Eckart Wintzen and the year is late 1990.  She did not pursue him; he came to her.  He was a millionaire and said, “Call me if you need anything.” They were about to go bankrupt and quite gloomy about the prospects for Peptide T research. Synchronistically, she received a call from Mr. Wintzen on the deadline and he said he would send her the money that she hadn’t even asked for! With a simple FAX, the government now got what they needed, proof that she had a major investor, one who could without a doubt supply the millions needed to support further research and development and successfully bring the drug to the marketplace. The solution had come only when she had stopped trying.

Relationship Anarchy & Monogamy


It seems that there is no logical contradiction in romantically loving two people at the same time. But the issue here is psychological, as it generates profound emotional dissonance. (If you invest yourself which women do by nature).

The dissonance stems from the fact that by definition, emotions demand partiality, that is, the preference of one person over another, which entails some sort of exclusivity. Partiality for a certain man or woman is a function of nature for the purpose of beneficial reproduction and it always has been. Pheremones control the process and generally, women do the picking since we are the soil that grows the baby and the seed. The male sperm is fertilizer which may account for the lack of bond and his lack of emotion tied to sex or any physical body. I don’t know. Women’s bodies know everything, are emotional and do bond and nurture. It’s crazy being a woman. We’re like walking magic without even trying.

Emotionally, it is extremely painful to imagine your lover in the arms of another person. Indeed, most of those who told of being romantically in love with two people at the same time and pleased with the experience also claimed that they would not like to be at the other end of the relationship; that is, they would find it enormously difficult, if not impossible, to share their beloved with someone else.

The deeper problem, however, does not concern normative values, as seen in heteronormativity and amatonormativity but rather emotional ones. It can’t really be completely intellectualized. Even if this process of relaxing of moral norms continues, and there is no reason why it shouldn’t, a major problem remains: the partiality that colors our emotional system, and in particular jealousy, fear, humiliation, and sorrow which are associated with realizing that your beloved partner is in love with someone else. These are million-year-old brain functions brought on by hormones for our survival!

How can you not be partial toward someone you bond your soul (body and mind) to? Answer; You don’t bond. If that continues, the foundation of society, the family within a community, unravels.

But if you are a unique individual, then you must only bind your soul to another unique individual to which you are in affinity. Because you are individual, it can only ever be partial because you largely belong to yourself, is my thought. What of that?

Pardon my bluntness here, but I believe that in essence, wives are patriarchal fuck girls that serve as a status trophy for a man. The king in his castle. “This is the fuck girl (wife) that will bear my children says the fuckboy. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want the delight of other pussies that I call friends”. And millions of men feel entitled to just that… while they’re married…secretly. No love, no bond. But the fact that they married shields them from the truth. They “appear” to be bonded in monogamy which is a sign of emotional maturity, as long as they don’t get caught being immature and indulgent.

Post-fertility, I have no idea what my function is to a man. It’s not going to be a nurse to his lack of health. I do know that a woman, absent the fear of getting pregnant and remaining sexual and healthy could turn the world on its head. It could be considered a woman’s prime and make all the young perky girls ruffle in competition. I guess that’s a cougar. It’s tempting.

But what about bonding? When are men going to feel a compulsion and obligation to love and bond as much as women?

I don’t know. I just know that sex is meaningless and jungle level without it. I’m not interested.

Network of Mind IN the Cells


steven-holl-shadow-art

Steven Holl-Shadow Art

Chapter 9 of “The Molecules of Emotion” gets juicy. Dr. Pert says, on page 185

The three classically separated areas of neuroscience, endocrinology, and immunology with their various organs-the brain; the glands; and the spleen, bone marrow, and lymph nodes are actually joined to each other in a multidirectional network of communication linked by information carriers known as neuropeptides.

“…it might make more sense to emphasize the perspective of psychology rather than of neuroscience, for the term psycho clearly conveys the study of mind, which encompasses but also goes beyond the study of the brain. I like to speculate that what the mind is, is the flow of information as it moves among the cells, organs, and systems of the body…the mind as we experience it is immaterial, yet it has physical substrate, which is both the body and the brain.”

The mind, then, is that which holds the network together, often acting below our consciousness, linking and coordinating the major systems and their organs and cells in an intelligently orchestrated symphony of life.  This view of the organism as an information network departs radically from the old Newtonian, mechanistic view where we saw the body in terms of energy and matter. But there is an intelligence running things.  Intelligence in the form of information running all the systems and creating behavior.”

Creating behavior?  Now there is where I part ways with her.  My son, who is studying psychology believes our behavior is determined by chemicals in the brain. That makes him, and those who agree with him, materialists. Many people believe our behavior is pre-determined or determined, that there is no real choice or free-will.  Frankly, this seems to be the central debate as we are squarely in the high-tech age, moving from Newtonian materialism to Einstein quantum states where something we see only exists because we see it collectively.  It doesn’t exist in and of itself, by itself.

What do your intuition and experience tell you here?  How has your life unfolded?  My life has taught me that I create my reality and my body condition by the habitual feeling, beliefs, and thoughts that I run. So I check myself every day. It’s called mindfulness. While I am part of an agreed upon collective mind field as I look out my office window at the snow-covered roofs, my individual perception, interpretation, feeling, and thought processes are chosen by me.  Am I kidding myself?  Am I just a puppet on a string? Or are we truly at choice.

It makes no sense to believe we’re puppets. Otherwise, our lives would all be the same and unfold in a gentrified fashion and have no meaning or differentiation. There is an observation! Many people’s live ARE gentrified because they are not acting on their power to choose; free will. It is possible to abrogate your rights in the universe and then your mind goes into default mode, programmed by your family, Facebook, and CNN and you are part of the herd mentality. There are a thousand ways to free yourself from that and uplift your mind. Follow your intuition.

While it’s true that in my personal life, death/change has been a constant around me, it’s not something I chose to happen; I’ve witnessed it happening to others first hand. The universe allowed it to occur around me for a reason or maybe I did. However, my individual choices are indeed the reason I find myself in my current situation. It’s all good.

My mind is run by my intuition 24/7 and always has been, for as long as I can remember. Personally, I feel like I live in a kaleidoscope. When others see static sameness, I see and feel minute details of an ever-changing landscape of colors, vibes, temperatures, shapes, dimensions, and souls coming and going. Even sitting still, I feel in my body that life around me on earth is a dance of changes in light and shadow and I interpret them as quickly as I can and respond.

The Mind-Body Connection; Emotion-Carrying Peptides


Molecules of Emotion cover

I’m sorry I haven’t blogged on here in a few days but I’m totally engrossed in this book! Wow did Dr. Candace Pert get put through the grinder in the NIH (National Institute of Health) Science Palace where it was all about competition, politics, gossip, and the good-ole-boy system.  I’ve heard recently how bad the sciences have gotten for women, sort of like the current sexual harassment scandal that is causing men in power to drop like flies, but frankly, what I’m reading about her experience is far worse than anything overtly sexual. (Charlie Rose is the latest one today and I liked his show!) It’s all very disappointing, but not surprising, at least not to me given what I’ve been through in my jobs.  It’s all outlined in my book “Healer”.

The scientists she worked with at the top in the science field were unmitigated assholes.  They lied, were verbally abusive to her, said, “be a good girl” to her, stole her ideas, took the awards and credit for her work, and basically broke her heart. As I was reading the last chapter, I googled her to find out what she was doing now and she died already.  Not surprising from what I’m reading.  She was a brilliant, breakthrough scientist, wife, and mother. But of course, her personal life suffered due to all of that stress in addition to her passion for her work.  Such is the case for any very smart, accomplished woman.

I’m in the section where Candace’s father has died and she’s had it with being treated like dirt because she’s a brilliant woman with quite an intuition.  Again, gee, ya don’t say! Here are few tidbits:

“The body is the unconscious mind. Repressed traumas caused by overwhelming emotion can be stored in a body part, thereafter affecting our ability to feel that part or even move it.”

This was her conclusion after giving a detailed blow by blow of lab experiments that allowed her and her team to reach this conclusion.  It’s pretty technical (pages 138-140).

Using neuropeptides as the cue, our body-mind retrieves or represses emotions and behaviors. …biochemical change wrought at the receptor level is the molecular basis of memory.” (then she goes into specific science jargon)-p.143

On page 146 she starts pulling it out.

“There is no objective reality!” And she details how our brain and memory filters out what it deems unnecessary.  “Through visualization, for example, we can increase the blood flow into a body part and thereby increase the availability of oxygen and nutrients to carry away toxins and nourish the cells.

Repressed emotions are stored in the body-the unconscious mind-via the release of neuropeptide ligands, and those memories are held in their receptors.-p.147

Stay tuned, because she’s about to follow her intuition 100% as she pivots away from Science Dogma.  You mean…she becomes creative? Yes. And it leads to a huge discovery.

It’s amazing what can happen to the mind when you lose the ego and follow the heart which is the seat of the intuition.  Oh, and she found a good guy to fall in love with and work with.  Yes, there are good guys out there.

Maybe Humans Crave Certain Feelings, not Drugs Themselves


That’s a pretty interesting suggestion.  It’s probably not a new one but I sure don’t hear anyone talking about that.  It would mean that you crave the way a drug makes you feel.

You may say, “Well yeah!” Pardon me if my realization sounds naive or conservative.  I’m not.  I’m an extremely liberal woman but I was born sober, so obviously I’m liberal intellectually, in speaking, and in friendships, not in my hobbies.  I have never craved drugs and when I do try them they don’t affect me.  Go figure.  I’ve used alcohol, been buzzed many times and only drunk once. It does nothing for my feelings at all nor does it make my body change much, good or bad. I’ve used pot maybe five times and it doesn’t affect me. I’ve used different kinds of tobacco and I like the smell of it because it reminds me of jazz, but that’s it. I cannot relate to craving a drug to make my feelings change. That’s as odd to me as thinking that changing my clothes will change my personality.  It’s extremely irrational and makes no sense to me.

I AM exceedingly familiar with my feelings changing though, a lot!!  My feelings have always swung this way and that naturally ever since I’ve been a child.  I am in touch with a range of feelings that as a professionally trained actor, I’m able to evoke or bring to the surface quite easily.  So, it must just be my personality; the way my brain works. It does run in my family, being theatrical, but we are also counselors, therapists, and mediums.  I’m also a musician.  I come from an emotionally expressive family so that was seeded in my subconscious in utero.

What all of this is bringing to light is the fact that if you have an expressive art you can imbibe in, maybe those feelings you’re craving will start flowing and your drug craving may go down.  We all need to let our feelings out.  And what about sex?  I know women tend to be more emotional during sex than men if men are at all, but more sex would be good for women then. Most women are as comfortable with sexual feelings as they are with taking a shower or feeling ill.  It’s just part of having a body.  I know this is diametrically opposed to men.

Men, I don’t know how you deal with your feelings other than drinking.  My 19-year-old son tells me that men do get emotionally attached in relationships even though males don’t get emotional during sex itself.  I know that the emotion of sexual tension that occurs when you’re attracted to a female is very uncomfortable for most men and FEAR is your big emotion; maybe even anger at not being able to control the woman’s sexual feelings? That was some inside information I received yesterday that was fascinating.  So, let yourself “be” in a relationship, talking, feeling bonded to other males and females as friends are very therapeutic for guys.  Also, just letting yourself feel the sexual tension with a woman you like.  It doesn’t mean you have to take any major action on it immediately…I guess.

As a female, I don’t really emotionally need friendships as much as I need sex.  I don’t think many women admit that but that’s definitely the case for me.  Or maybe I’m just far more into feeling my body in its natural state than others are. So it’s more important for me to have a partner than many friendships…eventually.

I’ll follow this blog up with my intuition and findings on sexual tension between men and women and maybe even women and women and men and men.  That should be compelling and timely. The issue seems to be unraveling our society on all levels. It’s about time right? This male fear and issue of emotional control is called patriarchy; then it manifests in forced sex. Nada. But are women really completely emotionally innocent in all of this? I really don’t know, seriously asking.

Is it possible that the psychology of sexual predation and sexual harassment is a form of sexual tension that is physically out of alignment because of pent-up feelings? Stay tuned.

 

 

The Erroneous Line Drawn Between Science and Spirituality


Remember this Philosophy Tree I posted a few posts ago? I love this thing. So let’s go back to the axiom at the top upon which all institutions of higher learning, all over the world, base their system of learning and degree-granting powers; Philosophy.

 

Image result for image of the branches of philosophy tree

All subjects are philosophical. One of the great tenets of philosophy, established by the Greeks, is debate and discussion. It’s pretty anti-social to say, “I’m right, it’s been proven, no more discussion. Go sit down and be quiet.” As objective as a physical scientist attempts to be with their scientific method, coming under the heading “Philosophy of Science”, they are subjective humans and can never be fully free from bias. It’s proven by their emotional outburst of anger if someone wants to have a discussion with them after they make absolute statements and need everyone to agree with them because the philosophy of science is “the truth”. “Playing well with others” learned in kindergarten is a good character attribute to have. I’m not saying I’m an expert at it being a high IQ woman, but I always start out being civil and it devolves from there.

Gender bias is rampant in any STEM (Science, technology, engineering, and math) discussion where a woman needs to have a say. It’s amazingly irrational, sort of proving my point above. I think it’s a good idea to qualify your work and be tolerant of dissent or a different perspective, otherwise, no matter how right you are, you lack integrity because you don’t care how you emotionally affect others.

So, look at that empty white space under “Philosophy of Religion” which comes from Ontology and Metaphysics”?  Go over to the left and the Philosophy of Science branch is loaded.  That is interesting, isn’t it?  Hardcore Newtonian Materialists would say, “That’s because we have hard evidence.” Yes, in your pants, which we women are happy for! but not when we have to earn money in the public workplace and you STILL have hard evidence. I would say it’s because we live in a patriarchal society controlled by money and power in the hands of men in academic institutions who routinely denigrate the scientific method of females in psychology and religion which is spirituality.  They are sciences too!

Now, look at “Philosophy of Mind”.  It sort of waves the right hand over to “Philosophy of Psychology” saying, “Well, there’s this!” with a glass of wine in the left hand having a party with “Philosophy of Religion”.  That’s sort of where we find ourselves in the year 2017.

We don’t have any boxes under Philosophy of Mind and Philosophy of Religion because we don’t have any money to do the experiments. There has been plenty of documentation and proof verifying that the study of Mind, Religion (Theology), Psychology and Parapsychology are worthwhile endeavors, but you can’t see the material manifestation of feelings, thoughts, dreams, and intuitions as easily as you can see a ball rolling down a hill for a physics experiment.  Well, at the very least, our field is much more complicated.  What can possibly be more complicated than studying how Mind manifests as feelings and physical being?

What is really changing now is proof from the quantum physicists that thoughts, feelings, and intuitions DO manifest in the body, literally, and cause illness or wellness, depending on how you align them. Everyone intuitively knows this. We don’t feel we need a double-blind study particularly, just some common sense.

Humans Weren’t Designed to be Rational and We’re Better Thinkers for it.


Trust your instincts

“Despite the growing reliance on “big data” to game out every decision, it’s clear to anyone with a glimmer of self-awareness that humans are incapable of constantly rational thought. We simply don’t have the time or capacity to calculate the statistical probabilities and potential risks that come with every choice.

But even if we were able to live life according to such detailed calculations, doing so would put us at a massive disadvantage. This is because we live in a world of deep uncertainty, in which neat logic simply isn’t a good guide. It’s well-established that data-based decisions don’t inoculate against irrationality or prejudice, but even if it was possible to create a perfectly rational decision-making system based on all past experience, this wouldn’t be a foolproof guide to the future.”-Olivia Goldhill

Check out this chart.

Every Single Cognitive Bias

It reminds me of Sheldon on “The Big Bang Theory”.  It kind of paints a picture of autism and OCD behavior, which I’m not judging. The fact that Sheldon skews in favor of cold, hard science and numbs human emotion or social sensitivity is rare. I understand having lived with two different autistic partners.  To me, the brilliance is attractive in some way.  I’m not sure why yet.  Maybe I’m on the spectrum as ADHD? My son thinks so but no one else does.

In the 1970s, two psychologists proved, once and for all, that humans are not rational creatures. Daniel Kahneman and Amos Tversky discovered “cognitive biases,” showing that humans systematically make choices that defy clear logic.  I believe this is a visual interpretation of the original chart.  It is worth looking at and makes the point that we are by and largely subjective, emotional creatures.  It’s a beautiful thing…to me.

Here is the full article that goes with the “Cognitive Bias Chart”;

Humans weren’t designed to be rational and we’re better thinkers for it.

“Unconvinced? There’s an excellent real-world example of this: The financial crisis. Experts created sophisticated models and were confident that the events of the 2007 crisis were statistically impossible. Gerd Gigerenzer, Director of the Max Planck Institute for Human Development in Germany, who studies decision-making in real-world settings, says there is a major flaw in any system that attempts to be overly rational in our highly uncertain world.”

“If you fine-tune on the past with an optimization model, and the future is not like the past, then that can be a big failure, as illustrated in the last financial crisis,” he explains. “In a world where you can calculate the risks, the rational way is to rely on statistics and probability theory. But in a world of uncertainty, not everything is known—the future may be different from the past—then statistics by itself cannot provide you with the best answer anymore.”

“We need hot-headed, emotional decisions

Though calling someone hot-headed or overly emotional is generally a critique of their thinking process, emotions are in fact essential to decision-making. There’s even research to show that those who suffer brain damage in the part of the organ governing emotions often struggle to make decisions. They can weigh up the pros and cons, but can’t come down on one side.”

After reading the whole article, I am in favor of using both my intuition and my rational processes.  Humans have always done that and it’s not a neat 50/50 percent of the time one way or the other.  Everyone is different.  I support the use of the scientific method when it’s appropriate.  It’s not always appropriate!  Yet our patriarchal culture with the male scientists on top uses it to hit us all over the head with a two-by-four to make sure we know that they are in charge, to such an extent that very qualified women in STEM, (Science, technology, engineering, and math), flee the university setting because of extreme gender bias. They’ve done studies.

The males are not in charge with their controlling attitudes in science. It’s not going to last. And many times, they’ve been wrong. Many scientists will agree that it is quite desirable to also employ the intuition, especially if leads us away from militarism.  And there are millions of humane men that are very anti-militaristic.

I’m not going to get into the gender disparity on this issue at the moment, but suffice to say, I believe all of our work, females, and males will benefit from using and having respect for both. But intuition has been derided and disregarded in favor of the Philosophy of Science category and it needs to stop. The Science of Philosophy of the Mind and Psychology needs to be taken into account also.  That is also science.

 

What Does Cognitive Mean?


The modern meaning of cognitive has to do with mental processing or thinking. The thesaurus puts emotions under cognitive process as well but that’s not working for me based on seventeen years as a professional bodyworker and reiki master.

Emotions don’t come from the mind or the brain nor manifest there. Emotions come from the emotional body and the astral body and manifest in the digestive system and the heart. So emotions are not cognitive; they are cardioactive and digestive which would account for the fact that humans literally feel like their physical heart is broken when they separate from someone they love, they can’t eat, have no appetite, and what they do eat doesn’t stay in.

The emotional body is hooked to the physical body at the abdominal chakra 2 through the etheric body which is chakra 1, low back down to the bottom of the feet. The mental body is hooked to the physical body through the stomach or solar plexus. There is an energy body attached to all of the chakras as well as a certain type of mind.

The first problem in communication regarding all of this is the assumption that the physical brain is the same thing as the mind. Based on my experience, that is incorrect. The brain is a physical organ, spinning at a different energetic rate of manifestation than the mind. The mind moves between dimensions and is disembodied part of the time.

Our mind is active at night while we dream but our brain has no cognitive activity. They’ve measured it with their electrodes. The physical brain is resting. There is no thinking going on, but there is mental activity from the mind going on, which they don’t know how to measure with their instruments, so to them, it doesn’t exist.

The thesaurus states that the antonym of cognitive is body/physical. There you have the reason our health care system is so materialistic and messed up. It separates the mind from the body. If you’re going to do that you may as well be dead. Many people stuck in materialistic thinking are slowly trying to kill themselves with addictive behaviors that supply instant gratification because they feel that they are only a body, nothing else.

The mind is one with the body. The body is the mind. The body exists because of your mind. In short, your mind, all MIND is eternal or life would be one useless pile of nihilistic crap which makes absolutely no sense at all. A person has to be seriously disconnected to believe that mind dies. The brain dies, not the mind, and some would say, the soul doesn’t die either.

 

There is much to learn on this topic. To be continued.

If We’re Not Thinking in Dreams…


They know by studying the brain that we are not “thinking” while we sleep.

If I’m not thinking, then where are the people, places, voices, words, events, and feelings coming from? It’s not exactly like watching a movie; it’s more like an opaque, frenetic cloud that’s really alive.

I’m free in my dreams to sit back or join in, to interact or be quiet without judgment. Waking life is a dream for me. All day, while I’m “awake”, I’m trying to go back to my dream state to remember how I felt, who I saw, and what happened. It feels like there is a whole other life full of etheric information for me there. Waking life feels like just a resonance in a type of magnetic can; the kind you string together.

Where did I go? I know it was a good place because it affects my day, depending on where I went that night.

I’m not saying I don’t like it here, or earth, but the other side does beckon somehow. I’m a bit glad of that for when my body is worn to a frazzle at one-hundred years old, my work is done, and I’ve had the best damn orgasm I can possibly have with someone I love, it will be easy to drift off and say, “My work here is done.  I’m out.”  My senses and my body still want to drink in all that earth has to offer.

Earth is fabulous, no matter how hard it can get here.

earth magnetic portals - hidden