A Video that Goes Perfectly with “I’ll Never Love Again” by Lady Gaga from “A Star Is Born”

First, start the song, then scroll down and start the video. As a woman, this is how love tends to be for us. Especially after too much sex where the man is not or will not be emotionally involved with us. What’s the point then? It’s a deep pool where we feel alone being who we are.

 

This video is really beautiful and unique. I just happened to see it on my FB feed while I was listening to Lady Gaga’s song. Just keep the mute on the video while you listen to the song.

The Psychological Need to Infantalize Women in Relationships

The Infantilization of Adult, Professional Women

This article is fairly recent; 2017. My intuition tells me we may be reaching the apex of patriarchal definitions of women’s power as I’m noticing the younger women and men are not exactly absorbing the definition of roles the way we did in the hippie generation. That is to be expected and welcome. I’d rather get on to other issues in our culture but this one does not seem to be dying just yet. In addition, fertility and reproduction rates are going down which is a necessary slow down for the genders to equalize power. Nature is taking its course.

I’m experiencing this attempted “needy chick” projection onto me right now in a friendship that is almost two years old and has been a roller coaster of unstable behaviors from my friend. I’m done with this part of it now and it feels right to have stricter boundaries in place. I understand that men’s role in the world is being taken to task right now but that’s a good thing. The testosterone-induced inclination to blow stuff up and support the military is a true oppression for the planet and all the life forms that want to reproduce in peace.

While we hopefully are moving toward the end of the line here with projecting infantile behavior onto women (and men) due to dysfunctional, co-dependent programming from the home, we are still seeing;

“Ambitious women are treated with particular suspicion as if there’s something dubious and undesirable about women who pursue greatness, power, prominence, or even just success in their field. Men who compete with other men are unremarkable; male competition is the natural course of things, and given that men have long dominated electoral politics and many workplaces, competitions for power in politics or the workplace have long been male-only fights. That’s no longer the case. Now, women who pursue power, whether that’s elected office or a managerial role at work, are often competing with men, too. This co-ed competition touches on some of our deepest assumptions and biases about what women are supposed to be. It touches on some of the men’s deepest fears about what they stand to lose.”

“And so women who challenge the status quo must be put in their place. Sometimes, those women come across as so powerful and commanding that it’s tough to cast them as hapless children, and so detractors attack them for being too ambitious, suggesting that they must have gotten where they are through the stereotypical evil-female traits of deception and manipulation. These women are ball-busting bitches, cunning liars, and power-hungry harpies (see, for example, Hillary Clinton, Susan Rice, and Michelle Obama). Other times, women’s power itself is undercut, and this is where treating you like a child comes in. Often, detractors use both tactics against the same women – infantilizing them as princesses or crybabies, and also smearing them as craven or crazy (just ask Elizabeth Warren and Nancy Pelosi).”

“Women who have crossed some ever-changing threshold of what’s young enough to be considered attractive are supposed to drag their sagging carcasses off into the bushes and with dignity (or at least disappear from public view). Few things make misogynists angrier, and a lot of the public more uncomfortable, than the ones who keep talking in public anyway.”

 

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Businesswoman Standing At Conference Table

 

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A Star Is Born Movie Review

A Star Is Born Review-Vulture

This movie is doing very well in the review department so far and is still in theatres. But I saw this last night and was left a little flat frankly. I read the review found at the link above and agreed with most of it but I’d like to add that the movie lacked timbre change. The melodrama lacked strong up and down movement which is needed on the big screen. Instead, it was incredibly real, the acting so very real that I felt like I was a voyeur looking in on the very old, moldy issue of drug addiction and showbiz. I’m over it. Are you? I don’t feel that the story of “A Star Is Born” is a story worth re-telling now that we’re leveling past the subconscious drama of family dysfunction repeated in our own adulthood. Re-telling the story just keeps it going. That, and fame and fortune aren’t all they’re cracked up to be on a personal level.

The acting, from all of the cast, is Oscar worthy. Lady Gaga’s music and singing, the songs, Grammy worthy. I agree with all of that. But the movie as a whole did not hold together for me or move me very much. It was all very predictable, maybe because it’s about the fourth remake of this story?

I adore Lady Gaga even more than I did before. She is one talented woman and her acting was great! I feel like the movie goes to her. Kudos to Cooper for his work and the rest of the cast as well but she gets my biased admiration. Girl crush sismance.

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Bonding cont. “A House Is Not A Home”, Bill Evans, SO beautiful.

Here is a perfect example of the bonding I was talking about that tugs at everyone’s romantic heart strings.  But in the end??  I don’t know.  It is an absolutely beautiful song though…my favorite I think.

 

 

By Burt Bacharach & Hal David
A chair is still a chair
Even when there’s no one sitting there
But a chair is not a house
And a house is not a home
When there’s no one there to hold you tight
And no one there you can kiss good night
A room is still a room
Even when there’s nothing there but gloom
But a room is not a house
And a house is not a home
When the two of us are far apart
And one of us has a broken heart
Now and then I call your name
And suddenly your face appears
But it’s just a crazy game
When it ends, it ends in tears
Darling, have a heart
Don’t let one mistake keep us apart
I’m not meant to live alone
Turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there still in love with me
I’m not meant to live alone
Turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there still in love with me
Songwriters: Burt Bacharach / Hal David
A House Is Not A Home lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

There Will Be Rest

There Will Be Rest- Sara Teasdale (1884-1933)

There will be rest, and sure stars shining over the rooftops crowned with snow, A reign of rest, serene forgetting, The music of stillness holy and low. I will make this world of my devising Out of a dream in my lonely mind. I shall find the crystal of peace, – above me Stars I shall find.

I recommend closing your eyes and listening to this.  I find it to be meditative.

 

Bill Evans, “My Foolish Heart”

 

 

“My Foolish Heart” by Ned Washington
The night is like a lovely tune
Beware, my foolish heart
How white, the ever constant moon
Take care, my foolish heart

There’s a line between love and fascination
That’s hard to see, on an evening such as this
For they both give the very same sensation
When you’re lost in the magic of a kiss

Her lips, are much too close to mine
Beware, my foolish heart
But should our eager lips combine
Then let the fire start

For this time, it isn’t fascination
Or a dream that will fade and fall apart
It’s love this time, it’s love my foolish heart
My foolish heart

For this time, it isn’t fascination
Or a dream that will fade and fall apart
It’s love this time, it’s love my foolish heart

My foolish heart
My foolish heart
Poor foolish heart

The Secret of Life…

This is my personal theme song in every way.  Love it!

“Secret O’ Life” by James Taylor

The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.
Any fool can do it, there ain’t nothing to it.
Nobody knows how we got to the top of the hill.
But since we’re on our way down, we might as well enjoy the ride.The secret of love is in opening up your heart.
It’s okay to feel afraid, but don’t let that stand in your way.
Cause everyone knows that love is the only road.
And since we’re only here for a while, might as well show some style. Give us a smile.

Isn’t it a lovely ride? Sliding down, gliding down,
try not to try too hard, it’s just a lovely ride.

Now the thing about time is that time isn’t really real.
It’s just your point of view, how does it feel for you?
Einstein said he could never understand it all.
Planets spinning through space, the smile upon your face, welcome to the human race.

Some kind of lovely ride. See me sliding down, I’ll be gliding down.
Try not to try too hard, it’s just a lovely ride.
Isn’t it a lovely ride? Sliding down, gliding down,
try not to try too hard, it’s just a lovely ride.
The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.