via Alone/lonely
I was inspired by Cristian Mihai’s blog about being alone. I shared the link above. Please read it if you have not. I actually just blogged on “I’m Alone Now” because my nineteen-year-old son left home.
I told Cristian that I related exactly to about eighty-percent of how he feels and I’m guessing many writers on here are introverts and love to be alone. But for me, it’s very positive. I never feel lonely. In fact, I wish I had longer streams of time, undisturbed alone to read, think and write. I’m still very busy in my home and have a small holistic business here so people are in and out. That may be part of it, I’m not sure.
I paused when Cristian wrote, “You can’t change how you feel”. Long pause. “Hmmm.” “No, he’s right.” I thought. “Feelings are organic. They just come up.” We all know that and it’s part of what makes us writers. But I have a physical process I go through that I want to share that turns my tears, worry, anxiety, sadness, the concern that comes up organically into feeling better.
I observe my breath. In and out. It is MY breath in MY body. I have complete control over how my breathing feels and how I allow my breath to reach my organs. I envision my blood pulsing through me. It feels very warm and loving. I relax my feet and make sure they are planted on the ground. I relax my legs. As a writer, I find immense joy and gratitude in feeling my brain and eyes process like a computer, my thoughts and then how my hands type. Then I stop and observe my breathing again. I am alive. I knew once and can remember what it felt like when I was almost dead in 1996 the day before my birthday when I had an ectopic pregnancy. I have this day, this time to keep learning and processing my journey in my body that no one else can control. I have control over this process and this moment.
So, I guess my technique is grounding. Think of a two-pronged plug that you put into a grounded wall socket. The two prongs are your legs and the electrical outlet is the ground; the Earth. When you inhabit and are mindful of your physical process, the chaotic, mean, death-riddled, unloving world can swirl around you unhindered. You have no control over any of them or their events. But you do have total, unequivocal control over tuning into YOUR BODY, plugging it in and turning it on and observing how each part of your body feels, not just the thoughts and emotions you tend to be running that day based on events, either theirs or yours.
I love my body so much for having its own balanced process that literally guides me and grounds me each day. Of course, I honor my heart, which has its organic emotional flow, but it…is…fickle. The heart is fickle!! At least mine is. Of course, I honor my thought processes. The brain/mind is amazing in its ability to digest and process information but the eyes only see what is visible, right in front of it in the light and believe only what it sees. The eyes only see ILLUSION and then your mind tells you it’s real. It’s a pretty good magic trick. The heart only feels immediate feelings and tell you they are real.
The body doesn’t lie. Your breath doesn’t lie. Just as sure as the trees know exactly how deep to push their roots, reach up with their branches, leaf out, drop their leaves and blow in a storm, so your body also has billions of years of DNA in evolution and it knows exactly…what to do. The same is true for all of nature from season to season. Nature is the truth and life itself.
Our health care system, our society, our media, and our civilization would take that grounding, the Earth life force, Gaia in all of her eternal ways and consciousness and tell her who she is and when to do it, as though she were a little girl. They would control that vital physical knowledge for themselves, hijack it from you and tell the daughters and sons of the Earth that they know your body better. They don’t. It’s your body, your truth, your power and your reason for being on the planet. Let the wisdom and rhythm of your body guide your heart and mind and you will be in a safe harbor while you live no matter what your heart and mind “see”.
Our bodies are ancient and universal and intimately tied to everything on the planet. We are gods and goddesses in all different forms dancing our way through time and eternity just for the sheer experience of it. Our in-breath and out-breath prove it.
Freedom Bound by Sculptor Paige Bradley, http://paigebradley.com