Healers heal themselves, they don’t heal others. We can share our work with others though so they can be about taking care of themselves also. Healers are authentic, living examples of how we can step out of our subconscious imprinting from parents, family, and provincial upbringing to create our conscious mind and live a truly free life of our choosing. We also know how to access the information in our unconscious mind through the dream state. The unconscious mind transcends intellect, brings forward intuition and allows it to MANIFEST in physical! The information in the dream state, where there is no thinking, is available to everyone.
Who am I kidding? I am scared as crap to meet my twin flame. There is no possession here and I’m in new territory. The attraction is so different that I don’t know what to expect. He made it clear that he wants to be intimate with me and I reciprocated because we know each other so well, but my intuition is telling me that he may feel he spoke too soon. I’m not like the other women he’s known. I don’t do hook ups, I care and I love, even if it’s just a lover. There is no usage, just “getting off”, proving his manhood or conquering me here. He’s in new territory too. If there is one thing that’s been made perfectly clear to him over a year and a half, it’s that I am not a woman to be bossed around, talked down to or controlled.
I don’t want to say I need his respect because I don’t. I respect myself, but how does a man deal with a woman who respects herself? Does he really want to have sex with her no matter how hot she is? I’m pretty sure guys don’t go for women that respect themselves. They like the opposite so they don’t feel so intimidated that they can’t “perform”. That’s not politically correct so they never admit it but I think most women know it so we lie about or cover our intelligence. I don’t. I hate the word perform nor do I expect that of men. Am I all of a sudden supposed to act girly to protect his male ego? I don’t usually do that just to get sex. I know women do that all the time but I don’t. I want a guy to know and trust me. I know…stupid right? Men are human beings, not dogs. How idealistic of me.
I think he invited me out there and wants to see me for the same reason I do. This thing is crazy and both of us have deep, strange emotions and connection involved here. There is so much synchronicity yet we’re different people. We’ve agreed that we’re not about starting “a relationship” or possession of each other but to even talk about us in those terms doesn’t even fit.
When you meet your twin flame, you are each other in two separate bodies, the connection is telepathic and has been for a year and a half, I love myself, he loves himself so love is there but how will that love manifest? I mean, I am my own best friend so maybe we’ll friends and that’s it.
I leave in a week and a half and I have to face my fear. I am not usually afraid of anything and I’m afraid of this. I admit it. Only because it’s the unknown and has been so odd. My intuition, which never fails me, tells me it will be fine but unpredictable.
My husband, my son’s father, who I was divorced from, died two years ago, then my fiance died three months after that. I told him that at the beginning when we first met and that I feel like men around me just die. He said, “You can’t think like that! It wasn’t anything you could change and you didn’t cause it.” No, I didn’t. He could feel me pull back from him, feeling like I believed I always lose men I love. They never stay with me. He was correct. But he kept coming back even though he got annoyed with me sometimes.
I do sort of feel that way. But maybe I’m afraid this will really be different and I’ll have to let go of kidding myself that I’m unloveable. Maybe I am loveable and maybe it’s possible something good can happen to me. The prospect of that change is monumental but I can’t let myself expect it. I’m letting myself truly entertain the possibility so that I go in with an open mind. That’s the best I can do.
Since when does a man really love an intelligent woman that doesn’t want to define herself by a relationship? Usually never. But this isn’t normal…at all.
I see so much admonition and platitude doodling on FB and Twitter. Posts saying, “Be this way, not this way”, “Act this way, not this way” “Be your best, not your worst” and on and on. I think it’s getting old. Human beings always just do what comes naturally to them. Most of us just behave in a way that we always behave or whatever is our habit.
It’s authentic, for good or bad. Frankly, just being yourself, grumpy, naked or clothed, dancing crazily around the house or sleeping a lot is what it is. Some people drink too much. Others eat too much. Some people are high all the time. All of that are emotions that haven’t come forward. But let’s face it; it’s not easy for any of us to admit when we feel angry, impatient, guilty, or selfish.
Still, it’s the truth and the truth is good. So honestly, I think most human beings just prefer that others around them just be themselves. Just be who you are in the moment and don’t try to be something else. It gets on my nerves when people act contrived and ambitious. I wonder what they’re hiding.
I don’t care how others act too much. If it really bothers me, I’ll find an exit. If I really like it, I’ll go towards it and I think most people do that. You don’t have to complain too much or try to change anything. Sometimes it’s best to relax and not care.
(I wrote this seven years ago but forgot about it.)
The memories of the past tumble down the hill like rocks and wash over me…
like so many waves that crash on the shore
only to go out to sea to be mixed in with the foam, the seaweed, the plethora of gorgeous salt life that heals and evolves all life.
The salt tears only last one minute to transmit my signal.
The heat, the pulsing in my muscles, the steady beat of my heart in the workout show that the source of being in my blood, my body, and my breath, given to me by this Perfect Earth will erase, heal, and forever dispel the smaller pieces of Earth that are to only be absorbed into all that is.
Bless the body.
Bless the blood.
Bless the heartbeat.
Bless the plants and trees and flowers and small creatures that give us pure, big, joy.
Goddess protect the children from harm through all Mothers and Fathers that honor you…and dispel The Sleep Walking Takers like so many rocks falling into the sea where they too can be transformed by the waves, the salt, and the seaweed given to all as a good gift.
Bless Mother Earth that has given us every good, perfect thing as we travel this elusive journey of pain and death and wake up to Perfection.
©Lisa Townsend, 12/2/11
I’ve been an intuitive, psychic person my entire life. My brain is like a radio station picking up the signals. I just have to sort through them. I just picture a person, tune into their “station” and feel their vibe in my mind. Then I can see what’s going on with them, what they’re doing, how their feeling, you name it. I’m not going to do that all day because I’m living my own life. It would be terribly distracting and a waste of my time. I have no need to vampire off of other people’s vibes to keep myself afloat. I live from my own inner self. The human brain does have this capacity though and many people have it.
It’s not a cake walk. I’m a lightworker and a lover, so I’m very sensitive to nasty, crappy, toxic energy. I don’t and won’t tune into people or read people that live on the “dark side” unless I have a super important reason to. Sometimes Spirit, says, “Go ahead. We’re here.” That energy is bad to expose yourself to. Most people that I’ve seen walk in between light and dark, yin and yang and that is quite normal for Earth because we’re all learning about our soul and mind power and how to use it correctly to be creators.
It is common for me to see pictures and sense feelings and energies upon meeting someone. It’s easy for me to hear and feel loved ones who have passed over when talking to someone on the phone and the details I receive are accurate. They confirm it when I’ve never spoken to them before nor have I met them. I can usually see what someone is doing when I’m talking to them on the phone, and I have prescient dreams. All of that is normal for me. I think all human brains could do it if the skill was honed, but you need to allow it to flow.
I am not Wiccan, pagan, or anything because I don’t worship earth or the Universe or entities. I do believe in God and J.C. has my heart but the religions are no different than the state. I’m aware of how unusual I seem but I believe more people are admitting that they are attuned or have one or more psychic senses than before. In the American culture that means you don’t talk about yourself very much just to be safe. The Christians, in particular, are very afraid of spiritual gifts, but fear is the basis of that religion. I work and center in love always and my life is the proof of it. No book has the power to tell me who I am. Even God doesn’t presume to tell people who they are. I was born in 1963 so now in 2018, things are getting better in our society in regard to this. There are even spirit mediums who are on the national circuit and quite famous.
I can’t say I fully support that because as an intuitive myself, I feel like my time is better spent empowering people to find their own, natural psychic nature than doing it for them. It’s no different in my office where in order for me to be a good example and teach people about what they’ve done to the soft tissue in their body, I have to put my hands on it and then they can feel how they’ve turned themselves to stone. The blood isn’t flowing as it should because their mind and emotions are clenched up. Don’t clench up or get angry too much or it will make you sick and in pain. Let it go and forgive because it’s the best thing for you, not for the other person.
When the blood stops flowing through your flesh it’s because your emotions and thoughts are repressed or misdirected, and you are not expressing yourself in some fashion and releasing it. Or your activities are done in stressful mind. Then the vibration goes straight into every cell of your body. There is no question here. All of this has been proven in the lab by neuroscientists. It’s a fact. I blogged about it as well in previous posts citing the examples. So, if you’re uncomfortable with your feelings and unwilling to face and release habitual, negative thought, then just know that is the main reason you are ill or in pain. It’s not about blame and guilt but empowerment. You have the power to align your thoughts and heart through your own choosing. You are the only one who can finally be mindful of it and let it all go. That, and you don’t HAVE to say it to anyone. You can be private about your experiences, I believe. Or journal it, let it go, and burn it! Privacy is important if you feel that way. That said if you really feel the need to talk it out, tell a counselor. But you still have to follow your own inner guidance.
Intuition is not “a hunch”, “a feeling”, “a sense”, “a guess” or following your nose to find the right way. Intuition is not a dream or emotions at all. Intuition is not the ability to “read minds” of people who are failing to communicate properly with you in the normal fashion. If I’m talking to someone, I’m listening to them and how they speak, I’m not intuitively reading them. That would be rude and more work for me when they need to do the work of communicating what they mean. Intuition is not “tuning into your heart” either.
Intuition is a function of the higher, rational brain and works in tandem with it. Great musicians, artists, and scientists use their whole brain in balance. Music IS math. Numbers are alive and can morph the way tuning on a musical note morphs. But the essence of the note or the number remains the same.
The more you use your brain for reading, critical thinking, writing, abstract thinking, and learning, the smarter you will become and the more highly developed both sides of your brain will be. We know we have a right and left brain hemisphere and one brain does the organizing work and the other one does the abstract spatial work but they always work together. This is the theme of my blog. Both men and women have intuition but because we are social creatures, for some reason, it’s perfectly acceptable for women to be intuitive and develop and show our sense highly but not so acceptable for men. That’s a big detriment. Why is that? Men are intuitive too, obviously, because they do have a right brain hemisphere. The same is true for women able to analyze information in a rational manner and do well with math. Obviously, we are capable of that because we have a left brain hemisphere.
Advice that tells you to follow your feelings and your thoughts is not good advice. Listen to your feelings as an indication of your truth and use it to make a decision but use other things as well, such as your intuition. That’s like telling someone driving in a car to just follow the signs they see on the road. Well, no, don’t just go where the signs point because there are all kinds of signs pointing in all different directions depending on where you want or need to go. The higher mind, using both hemispheres and your psychic senses, can make choices, lay out a plan, have an idea in mind, have a rational sense, think it through, and have an intuition about the destination, Yes!?? I mean…really. It’s the “think before you speak or leap” advice that is so rare on this planet. Too many people are running on instant gratification.
Don’t just do what you feel like doing or blow with the wind most of the time. That’s not to say you won’t make a mistake even if you think it through. The reason for that is the unconscious mind. It is there in our mind but we’re shielding it from ourselves because it’s too painful, like subconscious events from in utero-five years old that were brought on by our parents. Human history shows that those that blow with the wind litter the sides of the road and the hospitals far more than those who have used their mind to think it through. They also have more money, success, and productive communication and healthier relationships with the world around them.
I wonder sometimes if women and men mean, “I’m not looking to be possessed or to possess anyone.” when they say, “I don’t want a relationship.” Words are important. When it comes to attraction, the words one uses matter.
This is why marriage always ends. In truth, no one can possess anyone. We belong to ourselves. It’s plain and simple. What keeps two people near each other is affinity, attraction, same wave form, and comfort with each other. What splits two people is change. People change, grow and move. That’s nature. So, “forever marriage” isn’t realistic and more and more people realize that. It’s only good for the time that you’re reproducing. It’s forced togetherness for a time and it’s not a bad idea! After all, the parents are the creators of the subconscious mind of a child. That is real togetherness. But hopefully, the child will outgrow being controlled by his subconscious mind, into his conscious mind and everyone can move on and be free. That’s the ideal folks. Norman Rockwell was misguided.
Love on the other hand, is everywhere, always. Mostly, it’s in us and we can’t lose it. So as you move and grow through life, you should always be able to find someone on your frequency, someone with which you have affinity. Suffering is not called for in this life. You’re not going to get a prize for suffering and no one is requiring it of you. That’s one of the big lies of religion. It’s kind of silly because who needs religion to experience suffering?? It’s a given on this planet, everyone goes through it, no one can escape it, and no one gets a prize for being born; except a body. That’s your prize.
I find security in myself, by being what I need everyday and keeping myself organized and productive. It’s futile to find security in human beings. I’m sorry to burst everyone’s social bubble. I never saw anything so foolish in my life as pining for that. Human beings change like the weather and it’s natural! If you follow their meanderings, you’ll get lost too. It just happened to me. I sometimes forget what it’s like dealing closely with people who are not in control of their lives. It doesn’t take long for me to remember at times like this and be grateful that I’ve created what I have; a solid foundation underlying an active situation on the ground that keeps shifting.
Here is a perfect example of the bonding I was talking about that tugs at everyone’s romantic heart strings. But in the end?? I don’t know. It is an absolutely beautiful song though…my favorite I think.
But a chair is not a house
And a house is not a home
When there’s no one there to hold you tight
And no one there you can kiss good night
Even when there’s nothing there but gloom
But a room is not a house
And a house is not a home
When the two of us are far apart
And one of us has a broken heart
And suddenly your face appears
But it’s just a crazy game
When it ends, it ends in tears
Don’t let one mistake keep us apart
I’m not meant to live alone
Turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there still in love with me
Turn this house into a home
When I climb the stairs and turn the key
Oh, please be there still in love with me
It depends on how you define bonding which I address below. In spiritual circles, we say, “Love at all times”. So the heart is always open, to everyone and we are protected by Spirit and use our intuition as a guide so there is no fear. We still have to be discerning about how we express love. For indeed, there is no fear in Love. So, that’s the idea. Many highly spiritual people succeed in this so I know it’s possible.
Like all good ideas, sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t; boots on the ground kind of thing. When I put this to the test in my relationships with men and women I’d like to have a more specific plan since I’m a lover and a giver. My cup is always full and I need to empty it. That’s why I’m a giver. The last thing I need is more offloading, vampires, users, fakers and very unstable in my space looking for love that they need to find within and can find within. That’s when my cup empties quickly. That’s where discernment comes in.
How can we keep a strong boundary as empaths and lovers?
- If you truly love the other person, you accept where they are on the Self-Love spectrum. Don’t rush in where angels fear to tread. Instead, observe their behavior. Are they intuitive with you as you are with them? Are they emotionally sensitive to you when you need a shoulder or a hug or just to talk? They can give to you if they give to their own Self. Also, how much do they talk about their family? Are they still enslaved by a toxic family and defined by their toxic projection onto them? This issue is epidemic. Reiki aligns it.
- Do you love your own body enough so that when you have sex, you don’t suck energy from the other person but just “share” who you are? If you truly love your body you will just enjoy each other’s bodies, you won’t feel the need to possess the other. The other person can feel it if you do that.
- Is your conversation and dynamic peaceful with the other person? Or are there feelings of tension, or one person does all the talking all the time while the other one listens. Do they ask you how YOU are or is it always about them?
Intuition comes into play here more than reason. Studies have shown that humans highly communicate through body language. Everybody has different feelings but it’s not others job to figure you out. It’s your job to figure you out and know how you feel. It’s called maturity and mindfulness. You are the one IN your relationship, other’s are not or should not be, so they are of no use coming to a decision, ultimately. Our friends can be a sounding board for our own feelings though. That’s what friends are for; not to tell you what to do in a relationship.
How do we define bonding?
- “I miss you when you’re not here.” You’re bonded
- ” I need you next to me in bed”. You’re bonded
- “I need to talk to you to feel secure.” You’re bonded
- “I want to be with you more or most of the time.” You’re bonded
The list can go on but it’s always, “I need”, “I want” like a child. As an adult, you are able to regulate feelings of need and want via your brain. If your brain isn’t regulating it, put boots on the ground again and get exercising, moving, eating healthy and drinking water. It’s that simple. Just do it and stop pondering it.
I think bonded is a misnomer. I’d say you’re latched on, like a baby breastfeeding on its mother or a small child getting the affirmation and attention that they need from their father. All of this is the subconscious mind repeating unresolved patterns with the birth parents. That’s the main problem in our society. We need to release subconscious programming and become adults in our conscious program that we design for ourselves.
Can women keep their feelings during sex and not bond? How?
Realize that your feelings are for yourself. The man is barely absorbing them or feeling them anyway because all he feels is your body. While it’s true that the body is your feelings and thoughts, being mentally aware of your feelings is a higher level of cognition that women have. Most men don’t have it. They haven’t evolved the skill of knowing how they feel past being hungry or horny. It’s unbelievable to women but it reminds me of Hermione in Harry Potter when she referred to Ron as having the emotional range of a teaspoon. And it’s unfair for women to expect most men to be any different. That’s like asking women not to have breasts. Of course, we have breasts. It’s natural.
I would say “Yes”, we can love one another without traditional bonding but it’s not realistic to expect others to be able to. 98% of humans bond to one another and thus we have all the problems that we do on earth. People follow each other instead of their inner knowing. I personally think we need to grow past that but I certainly don’t expect it. True unity happens when we are all naturally sitting in our center. The fact is, we’re already bonded with all of life in the physical as one big family of Life. Just relax into that instead of adding another layer of latching on.
I am in a completely different personal space today because I’m going to meet my twin flame in person soon. We’ve been talking for a year and a half but weren’t ready to meet. We’re working on our connection and it’s all fine. The energy is very intense and different from anyone else I know. Twin flames are telepathic and two sides of one coin. It is a freely associated relationship, open, loving, and usually, it’s purpose is for spiritual work. There is no traditional possession with twin flames because you possess yourselves. The only way twin flames can unify is if they both sit in Self-Love so that the energy and bonding they exchange is unconditional. That’s how it works and is not for the faint of heart. When you’re finally attuned with your Higher Self, your love for others is unconditional. It is truly God in you and it’s real. This is what Spirituality, past religion, is about. Mind, Body, Spirit is ONE.
Twin Flame connection is not about our traditional view of individuals coming together in a love relationship. A twin flame is not about love or relationship. It’s about cosmic unity because the two of you are the same soul. Your lives have mirrored each other and your synchronicity continues to mirror. For instance, my twin flame believes the opposite of most men and believes that women deserve the best sexual attention a man can give. I am the same way with the connection to a man/lover. I believe a man deserves unconditional, adoring care from a woman, help, sharing, every good thing in character that she can be for herself and then him. Because I’ve rarely found that able to balance with sex, I’m celibate a lot and he is polyamorous a lot. They’re the same thing in that neither one of us is “in love” or in a relationship. When you have high standards for sex and relationships, it’s difficult to balance both.
You are unifying part of yourself with the other part to bring a FULL perspective to spiritual work that needs to be done. So the normal wishes, dreams, feelings, boundaries, struggles, ceremonies and rules do not apply in any way. This is not earthly stuff, it’s universal. The universe doesn’t care about sex, human rituals, mores, and taboos. It does care about cooperation and getting a job done for humanity. It does care about true unity.
Self-Love is on a spectrum. Everyone is at a different place but the fact remains, all humans want to feel better. Some do it through suffering and some through joy. It doesn’t matter. All humans will go to the end of the earth to feel connected, once they’re really touched by it. It has a drawing power that is beyond words, art, everything. It’s actually OUR BODIES. It’s LIFE itself all around us. All of the aliveness is one big loving fuck! Sex is prayer with the beloved and is full of grace and light.
Our societies view of sex is so far from grace it’s awful. Religion has separated itself from the earth and they haven’t fixed it. Being politically correct about environmental issues doesn’t fix that awful denial of the body and its rhythm. I will never deny it again. If you hope to find your Twin Flame, unite your own mind and feelings to your beautiful body, take care of it with fresh air, water, and food, but mostly, watch your vibration, your thoughts, and feelings and practice mindfulness. Life is sacred. Every breath is sacred. Humans and the Earth are beautiful. Don’t put toxic music, TV, people, or substances into your body! No toxic family either! Love Yourself and love others no matter what. The Universe has your back and eventually, so does your Twin Flame.
The male animal has been domesticated and it’s not all pretty. I think of that right-wing show I can’t stand, “Last Man Standing” with Tim Allan as the star. I am at a unique vantage point right now on this issue as a single, 55-year-old, financially independent woman.
The societal Disney pictures are that I’m supposed to have kids in college or graduated and grandchildren on the way in a loveless and sexless marriage going to church every Sunday in order to be respected and to be “an honest woman”. That is not the case here and I’m happy about it. I live my life in truth.
The societal Disney picture proscribed onto a 55-year-old man is pretty much the same but it’s far more likely that he is living a double life and is having sex on the side to add some novelty to his life. One life on one coast, one life on the other coast. Women don’t really have to do that and it isn’t fair is it? But we don’t need sexual novelty as a rule either. We just need love and security. We find real love through our children and grandchildren. I hear there is nothing better. Our mates have never been a terribly adequate source of love, let’s face it. Over time, we get tired of each other’s issues and the stats bear me out.
Women happily and independently move on and grow, usually living alone. The men are still dependent, stuck in this situation with nothing, having evolved with a brain that seeks more than one mate for reproduction. They are on the prowl again. There is an option for men; polyamory. This is a good article on it and explains reasons and motivations that have been studied.
I suppose some women like polyamory but I don’t think it comes naturally to us. Personally, if I can’t find the right partner that suits me emotionally and spiritually I remain celibate. I’ve done that for years at a time but never more than two. That sits very comfortably with me because I love deeply and never deny my feelings to suit men that are detached emotionally from sex. So really, polyamory and celibacy are related in that, if you can’t find the right partner you do what you have to do; whatever you need. But we have to admit that love is a magnet for men and for women. When someone finally loves and understands you, you’ll go to the end of the world to be with them.
If women have emotional issues, we know how to deal with them, grow, and decide what we want; a new mate or remain single. Then we do whatever we want. If you take care of yourself, there are a million men who will chase you. You just have to pick one. But for friends or family who choose polyamory, this is a good article on the possible motivations so you can understand it better rather than judge it.
This particular quote really rang true to me.
“Polyamory can effectively skirt the need to face an addiction and the painful feelings it covers. However, polyamory can also be utilized as a healthy means of coping with psychological difficulties, pre-existing trauma, differences in sexual desire, and the garden variety erotic boredom so common in long-term monogamous marriages.”
I see so many clients with painful feelings that have not come to the surface and then it resides in their bodies. That directly affects their ability to bond and love a mate and have great sex. This is just one of the reasons for polyamory. And of course, the basis of that is the parents and time in utero, and the early childhood that formed the subconscious mind; especially the mother. I have compassion for men that were born to very wounded, unstable mothers. They don’t have much feminine principle strength within them to pull from. Girls of wounded mothers do; themselves. It’s a blessing to be born female, no matter what the Chinese think. The inner mother is our greatest guide and support on this planet.
For men, I can only hope that they find a female friend that loves and nurtures them just as they are so they can learn to love their body, take care of themselves and be empowered men. Women have no excuse. We are the strong ones on the planet hands down. It is our responsibility to lead, take care of ourselves and to teach healing by being a good example.
It took me months to finish this book because Sheldrake’s ideas are so epic. It is a very worthwhile read if you want to understand evolution, nature, biology, life, change, and memory.
When I was almost done, I stared at the title and realized he only mentioned the past, not the present or the future. Time is not the subject of the book but how morphic resonance and formative causation rely on the past to create a new future through habits of behavior and memory. Yet from my own studies of the Tzolkin and True Time, I believe we time travel backward and forward in the radial time matrix to create synchronicity. Sheldrake, on the other hand, talks about probability structures as morphic fields. He’s got a point but that casts life as a guessing game, possible serendipity, luck, chance, or an accident. Tzolkin Cosmology teaches that by understanding the real nature of True Time we can observe synchronicity all around us and even predict what’s coming next. There are no accidents. Everything happens for a reason. I can’t predict what’s coming next by rational means by I have a friend who thinks he can. I “see” what’s coming next through my prescience and intuition. It’s quicker and usually more accurate. All of this is a spiral; not linear. Sheldrake does seem to be on a linear timeline.
Morphic resonance is an ambitious theory that brings into question the dogma of natural laws and instead presents a convincing hypothesis that nature is habitual but its probability structures are flexible. He’s close…very close.
I’d like to see his hypothesis merge with quantum field theory, time science, Tzolkin Cosmology and quantum physics so we can finally get the time right instead of being stuck in a third-dimensional explicate time warp. We all have dreams.